I'm an Arrancar? Since when?
by KrazyKyuubi
Summary: A girl wakes up in the middle of Hueco Mundo. She doesn't who she is, she doesn't even know she's an Arrancar. What's going on?
1. Chapter 1

_Fire and Ice_

_Some say the world will end in fire,_

_Some say in ice._

_From what I've tasted of desire_

_I hold with those who favor fire._

_But if it had to perish twice,_

_I think I know enough of hate_

_To say that for destruction ice_

_Is also great_

_And would suffice._

_Robert Frost_

A girl sat alone on the barren land, with no one except her wolf. She didn't know what she was doing there. Her thoughts were slowly coming back.

"Where am I? What am I doing here?" she muttered groggily.

"Hell if I know. We were hoping you could tell us."

Her head whipped back.

_Enemies,_ she thought. _with such strong spiritual energy. Why did I not sense them sooner? Why didn't Ookami - _

She jumped up and glanced down at her wolf. He was asleep. Or ill.But she couldn't remember.

"Who are you?" she hissed through her teeth. Her hands flew to the sword on her back, and she pulled it out of the sheath. She looked at it.

_A sword? Why do I have a sword?_

She saw her reflection in the sword. She gasped. Her headband was on, but it was white, like bone. She was also wearing earrings, both in the shape of fangs, and again, as white as bone.

_A hollow's mask. No, an Arrancar. I'm an Arrancar. Since when?!_

The thing she noticed next was her eyes. They were a hard, terrifying red. Like blood.

_I'm an Arrancar. I'm out in the middle of nowhere. Two people are here. Did they do this to me?_

Her brain rattled with many confusions. She didn't know what to think, but then she remembered why she had her sword out in the first place.

Enemies.

"Why should we tell you who we are? I asked first. And you haven't answered yet."

She looked over her visitors.

One was giant, compared to her, strong and stable looking. She didn't linger on details. His spiritual energy was not as strong as the other one. The one talking to her. He had teal colored hair and eyes. He looked rather fierce, and...

_Cute. But dangerous._

She always judged her opponent by strength. Then sex appeal. And visitor number two was winning at both. She would attack him last.

"I will not tell you my name. Leave."

"Huh. You answer quick. Well too bad for you, we're not leaving. And if we are, you're coming with us." He grinned like a maniac.

Something he said didn't make sense in her head.

"_You answer quick." _

That was odd. It seemed that she had taken at least a few minutes between questions. She didn't worry about it. She guessed that she just thought fast.

"Is that a challenge?" she questioned.

"I guess so, unless you want to come with us without fighting."

"Not a chance, bastard."

"Fine then. Here we come." The smile faded off the teal one's face.

_Oops. Both at once. Not sure I can do that. Wake up, Ookami..._

They both ran towards her.

"Ookami!" she yelled.

The wolf's eyes snapped open. He sprang up, and attacked the larger one, leaving her with the teal one.

_Teal one, _she thought._ I really must find out his name. That just sounds weird._

The teal one took a swing at her. She jumped out of the way and landed behind him, turning quickly before he cut her back.

The larger one and Ookami fought off to the side. Ookami was easily winning.

"So, your buddy's losing to wolf, I hope you're better." she said casually, while avoiding and returning swings.

He laughed. "My buddy? Yeah, well, he sucks. I wouldn't be surprised if he died. You still haven't told me your name. And I don't want to have to kill you for it. Aizen wouldn't be happy if did. He said to keep you alive."

Her focus faded.

_Aizen? Who's Aizen? Why does he want me? _

A howl broke her out of her daze. She looked over, and saw that Ookami had a large gash on his side. The large one looked exhausted, and now Ookami was mad. The wolf took a mad lunge at him, and ripped off his arms with fury. The wolf went for his head next.

There was a loud roar, whether from the Arrancar or Ookami she couldn't tell, because the teal one took the opportunity and struck her leg.

"Damn!"

She jumped, and landed sloppily on her hands and fell over. The teal one held his sword at her throat.

"Looks like I win. Too bad Yammy died. At least it wasn't your wolf. I think I like him better."

She glanced over at Ookami. He was bleeding badly, and he was asleep.

_I guess there's no chance of him helping me out here._ she thought.

She glared at her captor. "So now what? Are you going to take me to your leader, Zasen or whatever his name is?"

He laughed. "Zasen, that's a good one. Yes, I will be taking you to _Aizen _now."

He lowered his sword and walked toward her.

"What are you doing? Don't come any closer to m-WHAT are you DOING?!"

He stood her up and scooped her into his arms like a groom would a bride.

"Put me down you bastard! You son of a motherfucking bitch! Put me down!"

As she yelled at him, he only laughed.

"Well, don't you have a mouth on you. Besides, I hit you on your leg. There's no way you can walk."

She growled at him.

"I can too walk, now put me down before I kill you!"

He only laughed.

"I'd honestly like to see you try. Fine, I'll let you down on one condition."

"And what exactly would that condition be? If it's anything related to sex, I swear I will-"

"Whoa, that was a bad conclusion. I would never ask for something like that. Probably."

He winked at her.

"Goddamn you, you, ugh!"

"All I want to know is your name, sex will come later after we know each other a little better. Names, at least."

He grinned as he watched her face turn red, with anger and embarrassment.

"Why, you perverted-"

"Okay, okay. What's your name?"

"My name is-"

What was her name? She struck a blank.

"Uh, uh...I don't know."

He scowled.

"Do you really expect me to believe that?"

"No, really! I don't even remember why I'm here, or why I'm an Arrancar."

"Then how did you know the wolf's name?"

That was another mystery. Did she hit her head on a rock or something?

"I don't know. Honestly, I don't know."

"Your name is Chihana. Chihana Kaji."

They both glanced down. The wolf had just spoken.

"Ookami? You talk?"

"Yes, I talk. I am here to escort you to your new home."

"Which would be where, exactly?" the teal man asked.

"Hueco Mundo."

* * *

Cliffhanger, huh? This is just the start. I want your opinion if you think I should continue, because if you do, I will put up chapter 2 as soon as it's typed. Comment and tell me you want me to continue! If there's one person who wants me to continue, I will. But if everyone hates it and thinks I should stop, I will. Even if you're just curious to what happens next, be sure to tell me.


	2. Chapter 2

"Hueco Mundo?! What are you talking about Ookami?"

The wolf let out a sigh, and the teal man glared at it.

"Your memories were erased. All of your memories except my name. That's why you can think so fast, because you have lots of empty space in your head."

"Empty room, huh? Is she really naturally blond?"

She glared at him.

Ookami seemed to tune out the teal one's response.

"You did very bad things, and we can not let you remember them. So you were turned into an Arrancar and sent here to live in Hueco Mundo."

"That's not fair. What if I don't want to live here?"

"You don't have a choice. You either stay here, or I will be forced to kill you. It's as simple as that. Once I see to it that Aizen makes sure you can stay here, I will leave. But if you try to escape, I will come back."

She scowled.

"And what's with my name? Chihana Kaji? Is that my real name, or did you change it?"

The wolf sighed again, as if he was in pain.

"Your real name was erased. Chihana Kaji was the secondary name your parents chose for you. Now it is your real name."

"What does it mean?"

The wolf rolled his eyes.

"I don't know, chi means blood, hana means flower, and kaji means fire. I believe that's what your parents told me."

"So my name is blood flower? It figures. Two minutes into some new life and I'm already a freak. I want to kill my parents."

"Don't worry, you already did."

"What?!"

"I can't tell you. It was a memory that was sealed off. We have arrived."

They looked up. Hueco Mundo stood in front of them.

Ookami disappeared in a puff of smoke.

"Wow. So I'm going to be living here. What fun."

She glanced at the man carrying her.

"Hey, so you know my name now. What's yours?"

"Grimmjow."

Grimmjow. Huh. She sighed. Grimmjow looked at her curiously. She saw his glance.

"It's just not fair. Blood flower? Chihana? And you get Grimmjow. My life sucks."

He laughed at her.

"I have told Aizen of your arrival. He wishes to see you in person. I will be taking my leave now. Do not escape."

The wolf arrived, said this, and left in a cloud of fog.

"Well, that's that. I need to take you to Aizen."

"Not so fast. You said you'd let me down if I told you my name. Now you know it, so let me down."

"Nope. The wolf told me your name, not you. You get to be carried. Besides, you're fun to carry." he said with a grin on his face.

He shifted his grip so one of hands was positioned too close to her backside.

"Oh my god, you PERVERT! Put me down!"

He laughed and ran her to Aizen, Chihana shouting and hitting him the entire way.

* * *

Grimmjow put her down when they got to Aizen. She smacked him on the head.

"You must be Chihana. It's nice to meet you. So, you are an Arrancar?"

"Um, I guess. That's what Ookami said, right?"

"Yes, but where is your mask?"

"I think it's my headband and my earrings."

Aizen observed this carefully, but his eyes lingered on her a little longer than they should have.

She was just paranoid.

"Yes, I suppose they are. How odd."

"Yeah, well, I'm an odd person. Get used to it."

"Where is your hole?"

She blinked.

"Excuse, my _what_?"

"Hollows have holes. Grimmjow has one."

She looked over at Grimmjow. Sure enough, there was a hole right above his waist.

"Uh, I don't know. I just became an Arrancar. I don't see one on me anywhere."

She then observed what she was wearing. A simple, black, torn up shirt. The pants were the same. Torn up, and black.

"There might be one under my shirt somewhere..." she looked down at her chest.

Grimmjow grabbed her shirt and ripped it off of her in a swift tug.

Thank god whoever dressed her remembered to but a bra on her.

"Yeah, there's a hole in her. Pretty much where mine is."

Chihana was too stunned to do anything. One, because Grimmjow just pulled her shirt off. Two, she had a hole in her stomach. She couldn't decide which to be more concerned about.

"Holy crap, there's a goddamn hole in me! When did _that _happen?"

"It's part of being an hollow."

Over that, she now glared over at Grimmjow, who was just staring at her chest and grinning.

She hissed at him.

"Yes, come here and sit down, Chihana."

She walked over, happy to be away from Grimmjow, and sat down next to him.

"So, your wolf told me that you had your memories erased and needed to come live here. I accepted the offer, and you are welcome to stay here."

Aizen put his arm around her shoulders and started playing with her hair as he talked. He leaned his head closer to her face. She could feel his breath as he inhaled and exhaled.

Holy fucking hell.

She did _not_ want to live in Hueco Mundo, where everyone was perverted. At least Grimmjow was her age, and he was actually attractive. But this guy...

"Well, yes, that's very nice, I'd be happy to live here. Thank you for accepting me." she said quickly.

She sprung up from the couch and took several steps backwards.

Aizen looked confused.

"Yes. The wolf told me your strength, and I would like to have you as my Tenth Espada, because there's an opening since you killed Yammy."

"Sure, sure. Fine with me."

"We will remodel Yammy's room more to your tastes, but that will take a while. You are welcome to stay in my quarters while we work on it."

NO way was she staying in pervert man's quarters.

"It's okay, I can go a few nights without sleep."

"It will take longer than a few days."

She quickly changed her words.

"I can go a few months without sleep. No big deal."

If she stayed in his quarters, there was no way she was ever going to fall asleep anyway.

"She can stay in my quarters. I have a room open cause one of my fraccion got killed."

She looked over at Grimmjow. Stay in his quarters?! Well, at least he wasn't creepy...sort of...

"Uh, no really, I can just sleep in a hallway or something...or I can always kill myself so none of you have to worry about me..."

No one seemed to hear her.

"Very well. Chihana, you will be staying in Grimmjow's quarters. You may go there now."

They walked out of Aizen's room.

Chihana immediately started running her fingers through her hair and wiping her face.

"What's wrong with _you_? Did something bite you?"

"No, but that _freak_ basically just tried to seduce me, if you didn't notice."

His eyes narrowed.

"Yeah, I did. He can be like that sometimes."

She didn't, or did she? Did she detect a hint of jealousy in his words? Maybe staying with him was going to be fun after all...

The she remembered her current shirtless state.

"Hey, and what'd you just yank my shirt off for?! That was really unnecessary."

"Well, yeah, but I wanted to see how you reacted."

He looked down at her chest again.

She punched him on the arm.

"You _pervert_, you wanted to see how I reacted? I bet you wanted to see something else, you disgusting...pervert!"

"You like that word don't you? I've only known you for a few hours and you must have used the word pervert at least ten times."

"Only because it fits you so well, you bastard."

He sighed.

"H-Hey, what are you doing?! Why are you taking off your shirt?! Or jacket, or whatever it is?"

He threw it at her.

"I'm sick of you complaining. Just put it on. If you don't want to, I'm sure there are a few guys around here that would love to see you with your shirt off."

Chihana quickly put the jacket on.

"Thanks."

"Yeah, whatever. I just don't want anyone raping you. Aizen probably wouldn't be too happy."

She glared at him.

"Where is your room? Just hurry up and get there so I can get new clothes on."

"I don't think the room is stocked up on girl's clothes."

"Whatever. I can wear anything. Just so long as it's not torn up."

He laughed.

"What, you care about that? If you're some sort of clean freak, you're not going to like my quarters very much."

"It's better than staying in Zasen's."

"Aizen."

"Whatever."

* * *

Chapter 2 end! Remember to comment and let me know if you want me to continue! Hope you enjoyed!

By the way, I have nothing against blonds. My best friend is blond. The joke just fit in.


	3. Chapter 3

"So, this is your room?"

They walked into Grimmjow's room.

"Yeah. Is it as bad as you expected? Or worse?"

"Way better, actually."

"How bad did you think it was going to be?!"

Chihana ignored this question completely.

"So where's my room?"

Grimmjow sighed.

"Over there. You can go get dressed, or whatever. I'll tell my fraccion not to bother you."

Chihana walked into her temporary room. She opened the closet to get some clothes.

She wasn't surprised to see all boy's clothes. She wasn't good at sewing, but she was good with her sword. She could make some changes quickly.

She cut the sleeves off in a curve, and cut off the sides of the pants to make look more like bell-bottoms.

The pants looked odd, but she liked them. They had holes running all the way down her legs, only hooked together at the top and the very bottom of her legs.

She adjusted her old black pants into a pair of shorts to wear under the slitted pants.

They stayed up, and nothing important showed. The shirt was a little big in the middle, though.

She noticed that her sword had a long ribbon on the end of it. She tore it off and tied around her waist. Good thing the ribbon was black. It matched the outfit.

She surveyed herself in a mirror. She looked fine, and wasn't forgetting anything. The outfit had only taken her a few minutes to make.

_Damn,_ she thought._ I can wear anything. I make this look good._

She laughed at herself, and walked out the door.

"So what am I supposed to do now?"

"Well, I'm supposed to take you to a meeting, and - where did you get those?"

Grimmjow looked bemused.

"Uh, in the closet? Well, they weren't like this when I took them out, but, I cut some parts off to make them look more feminine. So, I have to go to a meeting?"

Grimmjow nodded.

"Well, lead the way, captain. I don't know the way. And quit staring at me."

Grimmjow averted his gaze and motioned to come with him.

"C'mon. It's this way."

They walked around Hueco Mundo in what seemed like circles to Chihana, but they soon came to a room.

"In here. Come on."

Chihana and Grimmjow walked in the room, which was already full. Grimmjow took his seat, so she knew where to sit since there was only one seat left.

_Oh boy. This is just like going to a new school and introducing yourself. I always hated that. I think. Well, if I could remember, I'm sure I would have hated it._

She sighed, and took her seat.

"Thank you all for coming. As you can see, we have a new Espada with us, since Yammy died. She will be replacing him. Chihana?"

Everyone stared at her. Damn you, Aizen. What the hell was she supposed to say?

"Uh, hi?"

The stares continued.

"..."

She wasn't sure if anyone was even blinking.

"Quit staring at me! What the fuck did you expect me to say?!"

Everyone returned their attention to Aizen.

"Yes, well, welcome, Chihana."

"Welcome to the freak club." Chihana muttered.

Grimmjow and one of the other Espadas grinned.

Damn. How loud had she said that?

The other Espada that had grinned was now listening to Aizen. Chihana looked at him out of the corner of her eye.

He was tall, had an eye patch on, and looked like a spoon. Or a satellite dish. She couldn't tell which suited him better. He was creepy.

"You are all dismissed."

Chihana looked around. Everyone was getting up.

_Damn, I missed the whole meeting. Ah, well. Maybe Zasen will get mad at me and kill me._

Chihana got up too, and walked out the door last.

Grimmjow wasn't waiting for her, so she supposed he assumed she knew her way back.

Well, her head was pretty clear, so she could remember.

She started talking to herself as she walked.

"Well, gee, wasn't that fun. I hope I never have to do that again."

She yawned. Then she looked around.

No one else was in the hallway with her. She might as well go exploring.

She started walking in the direction opposite of Grimmjow's room.

_Whatever, maybe I'll get lost. That would be fun. Maybe I'll get lost on purpose._

* * *

She didn't know how long she'd been walking, but she was fairly sure she was good and lost.

"Well, isn't this nice. And it's getting dark, too. Maybe I will get to sleep in a hallway after all."

She smiled at the thought. Only then, someone's spiritual pressure intruded her thoughts. She grabbed her blade.

"So, you're the new Espada. Nice to meet you."

The figure cam out of the shadows. It was spoon man.

"Oh. Yeah. Nice to meet you too, uh..."

"Nnoitra."

"Erm, right. Nnoitra."

"So, where are you staying here? Where's you room?"

"Well, Z-Aizen said he was remodeling Yammy's room for me, so right now I'm staying with -"

It suddenly occurred to her she might not want to tell creepy where she slept.

"- one of the other Espadas. Oh look, it's getting dark. I should go."

Her sentence didn't sound suspicious because she thought it through quickly, and there was no pause. She started backing away, but spoony followed her.

"Oh, is that so? Which one?"

_Damn, I don't know any of their names, except Grimmjow's. Oh dear._

"Oh, I'm not good with names, I really should go."

She took a few steps back, quicker this time.

"I'm sure you should remember something. Appearance?"

_Fuck. How I am I not supposed to remember appearance? Maybe I should go with the direct approach._

"Uh, uh, go away."

"Why? I didn't do anything."

He smiled. Really disturbingly.

"Yeah, well, I'm leaving." she said quickly.

She ran down the hallway before giving him time to comprehend what she said. But she knew it wouldn't take too long for him to give chase.

_Fuck, fuck, which was the right way? Why did I get lost?_

_You're asking me._

Chihana was pretty sure she wasn't crazy, but she definitely heard that in her head.

_Uh, hello?_

_Yes?_

_Who are you? And why are you in my head?_

_Ookami should have explained better. I'm your sword see?_

_No, I really don't see._

She hit a dead end.

"Give me a break."

She turned and kept running, because she could still feel spoony in close pursuit.

Her sword kept talking while she kept running, explaining why she could hear her sword, and that every Soul Reaper and Arrancar heard their sword.

_Okay, so I need to know your name. I think I remember this._

_That's good. My name is Koutetsu._

_Doesn't that mean steel?_

_...I think so._

_Ha. A sword who's name is steel. That's funny._

_Hey, at least I'm not a Blood Flower._

_True._

_Do you remember how to use Ban-Kai?_

_I though Soul Reapers did Ban-Kai. Don't Espadas like change form?_

_Yes, but you can do both. Before you had your memories wiped, you were a soul reaper. You were blond, too._

_I think my hair looks better black._

_Yes. Well, I shouldn't have told you you were a Soul Reaper. But you would have found out anyway._

_So to fight off spoony I need to use Ban-Kai?_

_Yes._

_Don't I have weaker attacks? That seems like overkill._

_You fight better that way._

_If you say so._

_You should probably use it now. Because with your navigational skills, I don't see you getting away from him anytime soon._

_Shut up. I'll use Ban-Kai if he catches up to me._

_Here's your chance._

_Shit..._

She went in circles. She could see her footprints.

"Of course. What a wonderful day."

She sighed and turned around. Spoony was there. She took out Koutetsu.

"You don't need to run. I wasn't going to do anything to you."

He grinned.

_Don't believe him._

_Oh gee, ya think? I'm not a moron._

"Like I'll believe that."

She raised her sword.

"Fine, then."

The grin turned into a frown.

_Here we go._

_Ah, yes, I should tell you, I'm a dual sword._

_A what now?_

_Two. I am two swords. Break me in half. Ban-Kai works better that way._

_Break you in half? I can't do that, how strong do you think I am?_

_It's already broken, you just need to separate the halves._

Chihana looked at the sword. There was a faint line running down the middle, indicating it could be broken into two different swords.

_Oh, break it in half that way, so both swords have half of the handle._

_What did you think I meant? Break my top off? So one was just the sharp part and the other the handle?_

_...Yes._

_You used to be so much smarter..._

_Shut up. Okay, but what if I don't remember what I'm doing?_

_You will, once you start fighting. Try it. Attack first._

_Why?_

_If you want to win, you have to make the first move._

_You're weird._

_No, I've just missed you. This is like day one all over again._

Spoony ran toward her.

Chihana broke her sword in half.

"Ban-Kai!"

Her swords turned into large, vine-like tentacles. Sharp, metal tetacles.

She grimaced.

"Oh good, I'm an octopus."

_Hey, shut up, I look cool._

_Whatever you say, Koutetsu._

Spoony took a swipe at her. The tentacles blocked it.

_Can I pin him to the wall with these?_

_Try it._

_What? But how?_

_Just think about it._

The tentacles suddenly split into many, and pinned spoony against the wall.

"What the hell?!"

_Cool._

_I told you you would know what you were doing._

"Not so tough now, eh satellite dish?"

Spoony quickly broke free and came at her again.

_Oops._

_Don't lose focus. You must be constantly alert to everything around you._

_How am I supposed to do that in a big battle?_

_Well, just for now. Once you practice a bit more and remember, the vines will act automatically on your subconscious mind._

_They look more like tentacles to me._

_...Well, I'm the sword and I say they are vines!_

_Whatever. I just want to get back to Grimmjow's._

_Then I shall end this for you. Relax._

The tentacles returned to two, and wrapped around spoony. Then the ends of them opened into the shape of flowers, and a mist poured out of them.

Spoony fell asleep.

"Cool. Can we go back now?"

_Yes, you're just lucky I was paying attention. Go left._

* * *

This one wasn't the funniest, but that'll come later. Be sure to comment!


	4. Chapter 4

As Chihana rounded a few more corners, she was quickly out of breath.

"Damn," she panted. "what the fuck? I'm never out of breath like this..."

_Maybe I should have had you use a weaker attack. It seems that using your Ban-Kai sucked all of your strength. It didn't occur to me you'd have to get used to this again. I just thought it would all come back to you._

"Yeah, well you thought wrong. Cause I'm fucking exhausted."

_I'm sorry. Looks like you'll have to train some more!_

"Oh boy. Sounds like fun..."

_Oh it is. Painful exercises, tiring training, it'll be the best!_

"Fuck you..." she gasped.

Chihana fell over.

_Oh dear. It seems she will be sleeping in a hallway after all._

_Just shut up. Let me rest._

_But you're lying on the floor._

_I don't care. I'm too tired to move, or talk._

_Suck it up! You must get back to Grimmjow's!_

_Says who? I like it here on the floor._

_This will help with your training! Endurance!_

_Fuck the training._

_Get up off that floor! Up, up, up!_

_No._

_I'll give you a cookie!_

_What the fuck is that supposed to mean?!_

_Just get up! Or suffer dire consequences!_

_If it'll make you shut up...._

_That's the spirit! Go girl, go!_

Chihana stood up.

_Not far now! Take a right! And be quick about it!_

"Mmm-hmm..."

Chihana dashed down the hallway.

_The sooner you get there, the sooner you can sleep! _

"You know what? I'm goin' as fast as I can, so just shut up...I'll get there eventually..."

_Fly! Fly like a bird! No, like a dragon! Dragons are fierce, strong warriors! Grah! Be a dragon! Conquer! Fight! Fly in the-_

_SHUT UP._

_Fine. Keep going straight. His door's in this hallway._

Chihana reached Grimmjow's door. She looked at the sky. She was sure she didn't have much time to sleep, if any at all. She had spent the whole night running.

She sighed, and walked in the door.

"Well, you sure took your time getting back from the meeting. Did you get lost? Don't you know the way to my room yet?"

Arrogant bastard.

"Y'know what, fuck you, I haven't exactly had the best night of my life...so just shut the fuck..."

Chihana passed out.

* * *

Light.

There was too much light.

It was morning.

"Ugh..."

Chihana sat up. She looked around in surprise. She was in her room.

Had Grimmjow put her here?

She got up.

_Good morning sleepyhead! Are you ready for training?_

Chihana groaned.

"Don't you ever go away? Or shut up?"

_Nope! I never go away!_

"How do Arrancars and Soul Reapers stand this all the time?"

_Um, well, I'm more chatty than other swords, so basically..._

"Basically I got stuck with the one sword who never shuts up."

_Yeah, basically. But you learned to tune me out._

"Well that's good."

She looked in the mirror. Her eyes widened.

Her clothes were changed.

"I didn't change my clothes unconsciously, did I?"

_No, but Grimmy certainly did._

"Are you saying he changed my clothes?!"

_Yep! Wasn't that kind?_

Her sword giggled as her face turned a deadly shade of red.

"I'll _kill_ that _bastard_! Where is he?!"

_Aw, don't be like that. He was only being nice._

"Nice! I'll kill him!"

_You should change into your normal clothes first. He put them in the closet._

Chihana quickly found her normal clothes, and changed into them. She stomped out the door.

Grimmjow wasn't there.

"Where the fuck did he go?"

_I dunno! Want to go out and ask people? It would give you a chance to learn their names! And you could make a good first impression._

Chihana rolled her eyes, but agreed.

At least if she met him in the hallway, his blood wouldn't get all over his already messy room.

She strolled through the hallways, memorizing paths, so she wouldn't get lost again.

_Learned our lesson, hmm?_

_Shut up._

No one else was in the hallways. There wasn't even a trace of spiritual energy. Where was everyone?

"God, did I miss a meeting or something?"

Something occurred to her.

_Koutetsu._

_Hmm?_

_Did my sensing ability get erased too? Do I have to learn that from scratch?_

_No._

_Then why couldn't I sense Grimmjow and Yammy when I first woke up?_

_You just got your memories erased. You were kind of out of it._

_How about when Nnoitra found me in the hallway?_

_You were distracted. It takes a few hours for your abilities to fully recover._

_And now, when I can't sense anyone, but I know they're here somewhere?_

_You were tired. You are tired. Your body's taken an incredible amount of stress. Give it a few minutes. You haven't even woken up yet._

Chihana relaxed for a minute.

Sure enough, she could soon sense spiritual energies all around her.

"Good. Now I can find Grimmjow."

_And other people you can tick off. That'll make you happy, right?_

She chuckled.

"Sure. Oh so very happy."

She kept walking, until she saw another Arrancar walking own the hallway as well.

He had green eyes, pale skin, and a mask that took up half his head, with a giant horn sticking out of it. Not to mention lines coming out from his eyes. He looked like he was crying.

_Dude. He looks stoned._

_Now, that's not nice. Go ask him where Grimmy is._

_I dunno. I don't really want to talk to him. He reminds me of...someone I don't remember..._

_I don't understand._

_He's creepy!_

_No, Spoony was creepy. I think he's just...calmer._

_You're not the one who has to talk to him!_

_Quit being a baby. If he tries to hurt you, just kick his ass._

_You make it sound like I'm capable of doing that._

_You are!_

_Well then, here goes nothing..._

"Uh, hey."

He stopped walking and looked at her.

"Have you seen Grimmjow anywhere?"

"No."

_Well he hasn't seen him. Oh darn._

_Keep asking questions! What's his name? Find it out!_

_Why?_

_In case Spoony asks where you're living! Then you can give him false information!_

_Ugh._

"So, uh, what's your name?"

He stared at her.

"Ulquiorra."

"Uh, that's a nice name?"

He turned and kept walking.

"See? What good did that do?"

_At least you learned his name._

"Yeah. You make that sound like an accomplishment!"

"Who are you talking to?"

She glanced back. Ulquiorra had stopped walking and was now staring at her expressionlessly.

_Uh, don't tell him._

"Erm, no one."

"You're lying."

_Lie._

_I can handle this, thank you. If I need your help, I'll ask you._

"No I'm not." she said too quickly.

"Yes you are."

He started walking towards her.

_Damn, now he probably thinks I'm a spy or something._

_Maybe you shouldn't have lied._

_Ya think?_

"Okay fine. I'm lying. Happy?"

"Who were you talking to?"

"I guess you're not happy. Are you ever happy? Do ever even look happy?"

"Who were you talking to?"

"My sword?"

He continued staring at her.

"One does not usually talk to his or her sword out loud."

"Really?"

He nodded.

"Oh. I didn't know that."

He turned around and continued walking.

"Grimmjow's out on a mission. He should be back later today."

Chihana blinked.

"Oh, okay. If you see him before I do, tell him he's should avoid me, or he's gonna die very painfully!"

Ulquiorra continued walking.

"_What a strange woman._" he thought.

* * *

**Bonus Story!**

_Hey Koutetsu, can I ask you somthing?_

_Sure!_

_Do swords have genders?_

_Uh, I think so!_

_Then are you a boy or a girl?_

_..._

_Cause you sound like a boy. But you act like a girl._

_..._

_Does that mean you're gay then?_

_..._

_Hey Koutetsu. Can I ask you something else?_

_...Sure?_

_Did I finally find out the secret to shutting you up?_

_..._

* * *

This is the end of Chapter 4! I hope you enjoyed it! Chapter 5 will be up soon! Don't forget to comment!


	5. Chapter 5

"So Grimmjow's not here."

_Bummer. So what are you going to do?_

"Maybe we can - oops."

_What?_

_Didn't Ulq...uh..._

_Ulquiorra._

_Didn't Ulquiorra say that most people didn't talk to their swords aloud?_

_You're not good with names are you? I should make you a book of names or something..._

_Did you hear what I said? Er, thought?_

_Yes. You're not like most people. Besides, you always talked to me aloud. It helped you feel less lonely._

_I was lonely?_

_Very. It was depressing..._

_Didn't I have any friends?_

_No. No Soul Reaper liked you. They thought you were too mean._

_What a bunch of bitches._

_Yeah. But here, you have friends._

_Like who?_

_Grimmjow. Aizen. Ulquiorra. Nnoitra._

_You've got to be kidding me._

_Well, friends they may not be, but at least they talk to you._

_And that makes me less lonely?_

_Right. You feel more at home here, since no one is afraid of you._

_Hmm._

_Keep talking aloud._

"Sorry."

_So, what were you saying we were going to do?_

"Well, do you think Zasen-"

_Aizen._

"Whatever. Do you think he would care if I went out into the desert? Out of this freaky palace?"

_I dunno. You're the tenth Espada. You should have free will._

"But what if he doesn't want me outside?"

_Then kick his ass. You're strong enough._

She rolled her eyes.

"I'm not invincible, you know. There are people stronger than me."

_Maybe now, but not then! And after I'm done training you, you can conquer anything!_

Chihana started walking.

_Where're you going?_

"Outside."

_But you don't know the way!_

"Sure I do. Go through a few walls, and we're there."

_But Aizen will be really mad if you do that!_

"I thought you said I could kick his ass."

_I lied! I was confused!_

"There's a shock."

_Shut up. But really!_

"Look, even if he does get mad at me, you saw the way he was acting when I was in his office, or whatever. If need be, I'll just use my..."

She shuddered.

"...feminine charm."

_So you'll be using the slut maneuver?_

"Yes. Wait, what?"

_Never mind. You used to call it that._

"I've done this _before?_"

_Yeah. Lots._

She shuddered again.

"Fine, let's just break down some walls and-"

She stopped.

_And?_

"And hold that thought. Guess who's spiritual energy I just sensed?"

_Grimmy's?_

"Yes..."

She smirked.

_Oh dear...But I don't want to get all bloody!_

"Too bad. Deal with it. Consider it training."

_I hate you._

"I know you do. Let's go find _Grimmy_."

Chihana started running.

_Run Grimmjow! Don't let her catch you!_

"You know he can't hear you."

_There's something to be said for trying to save an innocent life._

"Innocent? He's ripped off my shirt, he's changed all of my clothes-"

_What?_

"Did he only change my shirt and pants? Or did he..."

_He did. How bad are you going to kill him now?_

Chihana looked down her shirt. Her bra was a different color.

"That MOTHERFUCKING PERVERT!"

_Hey, at least he didn't change your underwear._

Chihana ran faster. She ran into a wall, and it a huge chunk flew off of it.

_Dude! Slow down! You just took out that wall!_

"Do you think I care?! He is so DEAD!"

_Oh come on! He meant well! Don't kill him!_

Chihana stopped.

"Oh hey, you woke up. Nice nap?"

"You. Are. DEAD."

Grimmjow looked confused.

"Why? What'd I do?"

"You changed my clothes! And my BRA! PERVERT!"

He smiled.

"Oh yeah. I couldn't just let you sleep in your day clothes could I? Then they'd be all wrinkled."

Chihana lunged at him and left a large slash on his chest.

"Ouch! What the fuck was that for?!"

She snarled.

"That sounded like a dying cat."

"That's what YOU'RE about sound like!"

"Very funny. You've got one hell of a body, by the way."

Her face turned blood red.

"DEAD! You are DEAD! I am going to KILL YOU!"

"Yeah, whatever. You couldn't if you tried."

_Oh no he did-ent._

"Dead! I am going to rip out your brain! And then I'm going cut you into tiny pieces and feed them to my dog!"

"You have a dog?"

"Shut up! You are dead! Dea-"

Grimmjow was suddenly right there in front of her, and he grabbed her and kissed her.

He forced her lips apart, and she felt his tongue exploring the inside of her mouth.

_Hey, you're finally gettin' some action! Woo-hoo!_

_FUCK YOU!_

"What the hell are you doing?! Bastard!" Chihana mumbled.

She took her sword and stabbed him in the arm.

_Wow. That was harsh. All he did was kiss you._

Grimmjow pushed her away.

"Fuck! That _hurt_!"

"You bastard! You fucking bastard! You motherfucking son of a goddamn bitch! You stuck your fucking tongue in my mouth! Pervert!"

"Nice vocabulary. I don't even think I've cussed that much in one breath."

Chihana yelled something incomprehensible.

Grimmjow laughed.

"Oh give me a break. It's your fault."

"MY fault?!"

"Yeah. You're the one tempting me."

She smacked his face.

"Ow..."

"FUCKER!"

Chihana stormed away.

_He just got bitchslapped._

_Stuff it. Fucker._

_Be happy. I think he likes you._

_Fuck you._

_You like him too._

_Fuck you._

_You enjoyed that._

_FUCK YOU._

_Grimmjow and Chihana sitting in a tree~K~I~S~S~I~N~G~_

_FUCK YOU!_

_First comes love, then comes marriage..._

_FUCK YOU! SHUT UP!_

_I don't know where you think you're heading. You're staying in his quarters anyway._

_SHUT UP._

_What are you going to do, sit in your room and close the door?_

_FUCK YOU. What if I am?_

_Grimmjow and Chihana sitting in a tree~_

Chihana threw Koutetsu down the hallway.

"I'm leaving you here!"

She ran back to Grimmjow's quarters, went in her room, and shut the door.

* * *

Chihana sat on her bed curled up in a ball.

She was quietly muttering to herself.

There was a knocking at her door.

Grimmjow was there. She could sense his energy.

But she pretended she didn't know that.

"Who's there?"

"You know who's here, open the door. I found your sword in the hallway."

"Go put it back."

"What?"

"I put my sword there because it was annoying the hell out of me. Go put it back."

"No. Just let me in."

"What's the password?"

"What password?! Just let me in so I can give you your sword!"

"That's not the password. You can guess again in thirty minutes. Have a nice day."

"Let me in. Or I'll break down your door."

"You'll have to fix it. Cause I won't."

Grimmjow kicked the door, and one of the hinges snapped and the door flew open.

"You broke the door. Now you have to fix it."

"I don't care, here's your sword."

He threw Koutetsu at her.

_I don't believe you left me in a hallway! I was so lonely and scared! How could you!_

"Bitch." Chihana mumbled.

She threw Koutetsu against the wall. It left a large gash.

"Hey, now you have to fix that. I didn't do it."

"You're the one who brought my sword back! And _you're _the one who kissed me!"

"It was only a kiss. Get a grip. That was probably the least of what I wanted to do to you."

"Bitch! Fucking bastard!"

He smiled.

"That was worse than a kiss! You like, molested my mouth! It was disgusting!"

"I enjoyed it."

"Fuck you."

He walked over to her sword and picked it up. He threw it back onto the bed with her.

_You are not a good person._

_Shut up._

_Grimmjow and Chihana sitting in a tree~K~I~S~S~I~N~G! First comes love, then comes marriage, then comes sex in a hotel in Paris!~_

"Where the hell did that come from? I don't recall that being the rest of the rhyme."

_Eh, I made it up. But the way you're going, I see sex coming before marriage._

"Fucker."

She threw Koutetsu out the open door. It hit something and made a large crashing noise.

"...What was that about?"

Chihana looked up. Grimmjow was still standing there. She forgot that she had spoken aloud. She thought it was better to tell the truth.

"My sword was being a bastard. So I threw him out the door."

"Is that why I hear you talking to yourself?"

"Yeah."

"So, what did it say?"

"Actually, it was singing..."

"Singing what?"

She repeated what Koutetsu had sung.

He grinned.

"It sounds pretty accurate to me."

He walked out the room laughing, and Chihana threw a pillow at him.

* * *

*Six hours later*

_Hello? Guys? Anyone? I'm still out here! Hallo! Chihana? Grimmy? I'm so lonely..._

* * *

Sorry I haven't updated in a while. School's been killer. I have Christmas break now though, so Chapter 6 should be up shortly. Don't forget to review!


	6. Chapter 6

Chihana woke up.

She was still wearing her day clothes. She had fallen asleep sitting on her bed.

The door was closed, but it was tilted, since it was still broken.

She glanced over at the wall. The gash was still there from when she had thrown Koutetsu.

Oops. Koutetsu.

She looked around the room. It wasn't anywhere.

She walked out of her room. She didn't see her sword.

"Dammit, where are you Koutetsu?"

"Looking for this?"

She whipped her head over. Grimmjow was standing there holding her sword.

He had a smug grin on his face. Obviously still proud of himself.

"Yes."

She walked over to him and held out her hand.

He handed her the sword.

_I was sooo lonely! Don't ever do that again! All night! I was out there all night! It was scary! Waa!_

Chihana rolled her eyes as Koutetsu continued complaining.

"We've got a meeting today. All of the Espadas are supposed to be there."

"Great. Just fantastic."

"Hey, it won't be that bad. Smile."

He put his hand on her shoulder. She bit it.

"Ow. That was hardly necessary."

"Don't touch me."

He rolled his eyes, and started walking out the door.

"Let's go, we'll be late."

"Like I care. Why don't you tell Zasen I won't be coming."

"Because then you'll have to be alone with _Aizen_ explaining to him why you weren't there."

Alone with creepy. She shivered.

"Well, hurry up! Go! I'll go to the damn meeting!"

She ran out the door ahead of him. He laughed.

* * *

"Chihana, may I speak to you for a moment?"

She turned around. Aizen was talking to her. Damn.

"Yes, Z-Aizen-sama?"

"How have you been in Grimmjow's quarters? I heard that the door broke."

If she told him that she really hated staying there, he'd probably just have her stay in his quarters. And that would be worse than willingly kissing Grimmjow.

"Oh, well, I just had a temper fit. It was nothing really. I'll fix the door today."

"Are you sure?"

Hell yes.

"Yes, Z-Aizen-sama. Everything is fine. Thank you for your concern."

She walked out of the conference room quickly.

_He gives me the creeps._

"You think he gives you the creeps? You're not the one he's trying to sexually harass."

_Yeah. I think if Grimmjow were to sexually harass you more, you might-_

"I thought you said you DIDN'T want to be left in the hallway again."

_It's such a nice day! Don't you think?_

"Moron..."

"Who's a moron?"

She looked over her side. Grimmjow was walking right next to her.

"Holy cra-whoa!"

She tripped. Grimmjow reached his arm out and caught her.

"Goddamn you, Grimmjow! Why the fuck did you scare me like that?!"

He grinned.

"I didn't mean to, I thought you knew I was walking next to you."

She growled. His grin got bigger.

She tried to step back, but she couldn't.

He was holding her next to him.

"Quit it. Let me go."

"Why? So you can trip again?"

"It was a one time thing. Let me go."

He scooped her up in his arms, and continued walking.

"Bastard. I believe I said let me go, not pick me up."

He ignored her.

She sighed, and crossed her arms in front of her.

_Whoa whoa whoa. You never give up like that. Who are you?_

_I figure he's never going to let me down. Why argue?_

_You like being held._

Her face turned red.

_I do not._

_You do too!_

_Not._

_I see your face turning red! You like it!_

_Shut up._

_Your retorts are getting weaker! You're lying!_

_Hmph._

_Grimmjow and Chihana sitting in a tree~K~I~S~I- no, wait. Did I miss an S?_

She sighed again, and ignored Koutetsu's singing.

To tell the truth, it wasn't really all that bad being held.

It was nice not to walk. She was tired. And he was rather warm...

She looked up at him. He didn't even seem to be struggling carrying her. And she knew she wasn't that light. He looked very pleased with himself.

He looked down at her. She blushed and quickly looked away.

She felt him quietly laughing, and she could just see his smile widening.

_Oh, he caught you staring!~_

_I wasn't staring._

_Yes you were. There's no denying it._

_..._

_Somebody's in love! At least he's cute._

She resumed ignoring Koutetsu.

Cute wasn't really an adjective someone would use to describe Grimmjow. But he was really hot...

No! What was she thinking? This was wrong. All an illusion.

But she glanced back at him again anyway.

He was really muscular, and she suddenly wondered why she had been rejecting him.

_Yeah, why have you been rejecting him? He's nice enough._

_..._

_Lost in thought? I'll let you get back to it._

They arrived back at his room. He shifted her to his left arm, and opened the door.

He walked into her room and sat down on her bed.

"You can, um, put me down now."

He looked at her.

"You were staring at me."

She blushed again. Damn reaction.

"Y-No...I wasn't..."

He smiled.

"Lier. I saw you."

Chihana continued blushing, but remained silent.

"What, no slue of cursing at me today? You sick or something?"

"I don't know...That seems like a reasonable explanation..."

He leaned down and kissed her forehead.

Her blush became darker, and her breathing got faster.

He straightened up, and brushed his hand through her hair.

"Well, you don't have fever."

"Isn't that good..." she muttered.

He leaned back over her, and kissed her again.

She felt his tongue inside her mouth again too, but this time she didn't mind it.

She enjoyed it.

She relaxed, and rested her hands against his chest.

He sat her on his lap, and wrapped his arms around her waist.

One of his hands ventured down and rested more around her ass.

"Pervert..." she mumbled.

He pushed her away and laughed.

She blinked.

"What was that for?" she said.

She felt sort of...disappointed.

"You are unbelievable. I was "molesting your mouth", and all you cared about was that I had my hand on your ass."

"Eh, I just, uh...Shut up..."

She blushed.

He continued laughing.

"Old habits die hard, alright?! Stop laughing."

He did stop laughing, but he was still grinning like mad.

"You know, that was like the one time I was actually letting you kiss me, and you just blew it. I'm not sure if I'll let you do it again."

"Oh please. You _want _to. You know you do."

"Well, you might be right about that..."

_I was right! You do like him! Grimmjow and Chihana sitting in a tree~K~I~S~S~I~N~G! First comes love, then comes marriage..._

"Could you wait a minute though?"

He looked confused.

She took her sword off of her belt, and threw him out the door again.

_Am I really that annoying? No fair..._

"Is your sword that distracting?"

"Yes..."

"Am I more distracting?"

"As much as I'd like to say yes, the answer is no..."

"I'd hate to be you."

"I'd hate to be _you._"

"Why?"

"Cause you're a perv."

He laughed.

"Let it go."

"Nope. Never."

"Forget about it."

"I will not forget about it. Nothing could make me forget."

"Are you sure?"

"Positive."

He leaned over, and pressed his lips against her neck.

She felt his tongue moving down her throat.

"Okay, I lied..."

"About what?" he breathed.

"About nothing being able to make me forget..."

"Forget what?"

"I don't know...I forget..."

He chuckled.

Grimmjow moved his tongue back up her neck, and made his way back to her lips.

Chihana slid her hands away from his chest, and wound them around his neck.

He put one of his hands on the top of her head, and began playing with her hair.

Then he started laughing.

He broke their connection and got up.

"What are you doing?! I though women were supposed to be more confusing than men! I just don't get you at all!"

"Well, you have work to do."

Chihana blinked.

"What? What kind of work?"

"You have to fix that gash in the wall."

She glanced over and looked at the gash.

"Can't it wait?"

"No, cause you also gotta fix the door."

"Hey, you broke the door, you're gonna fix it!"

"But you told Aizen _you'd_ fix the door today."

Chihana recalled saying such.

"Who cares what I told him? I didn't mean it."

"Wouldn't it be odd if he saw _me_ fixing the door _you'd_ said _you _would fix?"

"Damn you, Grimmjow. You just don't want to fix the door!"

"So?"

"Fuck you!"

He continued laughing.

"Get to work, you've gotta be done by sundown."

He walked out the door.

That bastard. Anything to get out of doing work.

She ran out the door, and picked up Koutetsu.

_That wasn't very long. What'd he do to you?_

_Nothing..._

_You seem disappointed by that fact._

_Shut up._

_Better start working on the door._

_Maybe I should make you fix the goddamn door!_

_I don't have arms! I'm a sword! _

_Then you'll just have to work extra hard then, won't you?_

* * *

After a while, she did get the door and the gash in the wall fixed.

"That sucked." she panted.

_It was good physical exercise, at least._

"I don't like physical exercise. I hate any kind of physical exercise."

_Any kind of physical exercise?_

"Yes? Why would you ask?"

_Well, I'm pretty sure you would enjoy one exercise I can think of..._

She did not like the tone of Koutetsu's voice. Something told her she was going to have to throw him again.

"And what exercise would that be?"

_Someone told me if you do it hard enough, it gets to be physically exhausting, and it really does exercise your muscles..._

"That is one kind of training I REFUSE to do."

_Aw, but it really is good for you. Even if it was with Grimmy?"_

She walked out the door and down the hallway.

_H-hey, where are you going?_

She came to Aizen's door, and she knocked on it. He answered with a surprised look on his face.

"Yes, Chihana?"

"Can I use your window for a minute?"

He stared at her blankly, and nodded.

She walked into his room, and approached the window.

_Don't you dare! I'll kill you!  
_

She threw Koutetsu out the window.

"Thank you, Aizen-sama."

"Sure?"

She walked out of the room.

"Why did she throw her sword out the window?"

"I'm honestly not sure, Gin..."

"What a strange girl."

"Yes..."

"Do you think she'll go out with me?'

"No Gin, she will most definitely not go out with you..."

* * *

I hope you liked Chapter 6! Merry Christmas everybody! And a happy new year and all that crap!


	7. Chapter 7 Christmas Chapter

**This is a Bonus Christmas-Themed Chapter! I had an idea for it after posting Chapter 6, so I went ahead and wrote it! I hope you enjoy!**

* * *

"Congratulations, Chihana."

Aizen's words puzzled her.

"For what?"

"You get to go on your first mission into the human world today. You will be observing Karakura Town."

"That doesn't seem like much of a mission."

"Well, it's an interesting little town. And it's an easy first mission. That's why I'm sending Grimmjow with you."

Fuck.

"Yay..."

* * *

"What's the matter with you?"

Chihana looked up at Grimmjow.

"Well, let's see, I'm going to be spending time with you, I'm in some freaky human body..."

"Gigai."

"I'm in some freaky gigai, I'm spending time with you, and I have to go on this stupid worthless mission..."

"I'm not that bad..."

"Yes, you are..."

Grimmjow rolled his eyes.

"Well, we're here. Start walking."

She started walking.

And immediately tripped.

She responded by letting out a long strain of cursing.

"Oh yeah, I forgot. And I'm wearing these damn shoes!"

Szayel had put high-heeled shoes on Chihana's gigai.

"You're the only girl I know that can't walk in heels."

"I'd like to see you try it, buster."

He helped her up.

"Why did that insane scientist put me in these things?"

"Because you're a girl."

"I'll kill him. I'll kill him, I'll kill him, I'll kill him..."

Chihana continued muttering as she stumbled around.

"Y'know what? Fuck it."

She slammed her heel down on the sidewalk, and it snapped off easily. She repeated the action with the other one.

"See? Now I can walk."

"Why didn't you just take them off?"

Chihana blinked.

"Because then I wouldn't have shoes?"

"There are stores that sell shoes in the human world, Chihana..."

"I know that. I did use to live in the human world."

"Then why didn't you just go buy other shoes?"

"I don't have money."

"Aizen gave me money. I told you that."

She bit her lower lip.

"To tell you the truth, I try to ignore you as much as possible..."

He sighed.

"I figured as much..."

* * *

"Now can you walk?"

Chihana looked down at her feet.

Grimmjow had gotten her new shoes from some store, and she could walk in them quite easily.

"Yes. So, where do we head to, captain?"

"Just walk. We're observing. There's no specific place we're supposed to be."

"Okay."

Houses were decorated in colored lights, and children ran around playing in snow.

_It must be Christmastime here._

_I guess so._

_Did I like Christmas, Koutetsu?_

_You didn't care much for it._

_Hmm._

"What the hell's going on around here?"

Chihana looked up.

"What, you've never heard of Christmas, Grimmjow?"

"No."

"Honestly?"

"Yes."

"Are you positive? You don't know anything about Christmas?"

"Is this twenty questions or something? I though I was pretty clear."

"It's just surprising. I mean, I'm the one who lost my memories and I still know about Christmas."

"That's because there's something wrong with your brain."

She punched him in the arm.

"Ow."

"Would you like to know about Christmas?"

"Sure..."

"Christmas is a time when all the people are merry and everyone's nice to each other. They give each other presents, play in snow, and do a bunch of other stuff."

"Sounds stupid."

"Be merry."

He scoffed.

"And the kids worship a really fat old guy named Santa Claus, because he supposedly gives presents to all the good kids in the world Christmas night."

"Uh-huh..."

"Yep."

"That sounds even more stupid."

"Scrooge."

"Who's that?"

"Never mind..."

They continued walking for several minutes in silence.

_Boooooring..._

_Quit complaining, Koutetsu. Maybe you should have stayed home like I asked._

_Are you cold?_

_Why?_

_You should act cold._

_...Why?_

_Because then it'll be just like in old romance movies! The couples always go for walks on Christmas, then the girl goes "I'm cold." And the guys pulls her close to him and then they get to mistletoe and kiss and live happily ever after!_

_Why would I want that?_

_Because you like Grimmjow._

_But that's so lame..._

_It beats boring!_

_Not really..._

She was cold, despite the fact that she had a jacket on. At least she wasn't wearing a skirt.

She looked at Grimmjow.

He seemed bored. He walked with his hands in his pockets, with the _I-really-wish-I-didn't-have-to-be-here-now_ look on his face.

She sighed, and then shivered involuntarily.

"You cold?"

His tone matched his expression.

"No. Why don't you smile?"

"Cause I'm not happy. Are you thrilled that we're just wandering with nothing to do?"

"Not really..."

"Exactly."

"Why don't we go in a building? It won't be as cold there."

"Whatever you say."

* * *

Out of all the buildings there, the mall was probably the worst possible choice.

They continued walking, dodging and avoiding all kinds of late holiday shoppers.

"You sure know how to pick them."

"Shut up, Grimmjow. I didn't see you offering any suggestions."

He shut up.

A man selling things off of a nearby cart spoke.

"Smile!"

Chihana smiled, and Grimmjow scowled.

There was a short flash, and the man handed her a photo.

"A holiday picture for the lovely couple. Free of charge, since you're such a charming young lady."

Grimmjow started to say something, and Chihana nudged him with her elbow.

"Thank you very much. Merry Christmas."

"To you too, madam."

They walked away.

"You just have to let it slide with people like that. Don't go making a fool of yourself. And don't go killing people that take pictures of you."

Grimmjow grunted.

"Don't you just look nice in this picture."

Chihana was smiling brightly, and Grimmjow looked as if he was going to bite someone's head off.

He smiled slightly.

"At least I don't look like a smiling idiot."

"Watch it, buddy."

He laughed.

* * *

"I am so sick of walking. And I'm sick of this stupid mall."

"Well, Aizen doesn't want us back before sundown."

The mall itself wasn't so bad, it was mostly the combination of Grimmjow and the mall.

Several other people had commented on what a cute couple they made, and this annoyed Chihana more than Grimmjow.

Grimmjow just repelled people. And the ones that came too close to him he ran into.

So Chihana had picked up more presents and apologized to more people than she could count.

And of course, Grimmjow just stood out of the way and watched while this all happened.

Even though he was the one who knocked them over in the first place.

"Screw Aizen."

"If you're so sick of walking, you could always sit down. And we could leave this mall."

"I'm all for it."

They walked out of a different door than the one they entered, and walked more until the mall was out of sight.

Chihana sat down on the sidewalk.

"Why don't you find a bench or something?"

"Why don't you shut your mouth?"

He sighed.

"When did Aizen say we could go back? Any time after sundown?"

No response.

She turned her head.

"Grimmjow? Hello?"

He wasn't paying attention to her. Just staring at the sky.

She suddenly had an idea.

There was snow on the sidewalk, so she balled some up and made a snowball.

She threw it at Grimmjow.

"What the fuck was that for?!"

"You weren't paying attention to me."

He brushed the snow off of his face.

"That was cold."

"Duh. It's snow. Did ya expect it to be warm?"

He smiled.

Then he threw a snowball at her.

"Hey! Now I'm cold!"

"Well, duh. It's snow. Did you expect it to be warm?" he said, imitating her voice.

She stood up and shook the snow off of her head.

Then she threw another snowball at Grimmjow.

Grimmjow also threw another snowball at her.

She jumped out of the way, and tripped in the process.

Grimmjow caught her, but they both fell down anyway.

They laid in the snow laughing.

"Hey, look at that."

Chihana pointed up to the street sign they were leaning against.

Somebody put mistletoe on it.

"So? What about it?"

"It's a Christmas tradition. Mistletoe."

"What are you supposed to do, then?"

"I'll show you."

She leaned over and kissed him.

He wrapped his arms around her and kissed her back.

_See? I told you so!_

_But I wasn't cold._

_And they lived happily ever after!  
_

They continued kissing, and it turned more provoking than romantic.

Grimmjow moaned.

He unzipped her jacket.

_I hate to interrupt, but the sun is down. Your mission is over._

_So? I'm okay with staying here..._

He started to unbutton her shirt.

_You're not supposed to have sex under the mistletoe. Just kiss. Save it for home._

_Uh-huh..._

_You have to go back anyway or Aizen's gonna send someone looking for you. And you don't really want someone seeing you having sex, do you? There could be people on the street too, you know...Plus it's too cold out here..._

_I know, I know...You're right..._

"Grimmjow..."

He bit her neck as he kept unbuttoning her shirt.

This was so not fair.

"Grimmjow...we have to go back..."

"It can wait."

"No, it really can't. Besides, it's too cold out here..."

"I'll keep you warm."

"People might see us..."

"I don't care."

"_I_ do. Save it for later."

He sighed, and buttoned her shirt back up.

"I really don't like you, you know that?"

"I don't quite believe you, since you were the one eating my neck and unbuttoning my shirt."

He growled.

"Let's go." she said, zipping her jacket up.

* * *

"How did your mission go?"

"Just fine, Aizen-sama."

"That's good. Anything to report?"

"Not really. It's Christmas there."

"I see. You can go."

"Thank you, Aizen-sama."

She walked out the door, and back to Grimmjow's room.

"What'd he ask?"

"Nothing. That whole trip was useless."

"I wouldn't call it useless..."

He walked over to her.

He twirled something around on his finger.

Mistletoe.

"Where did you get that?"

"Merry Christmas."

He kissed her.

* * *

I hope you enjoyed! Chapter 8 should be up soon! Don't forget to review! And Merry Christmas again!


	8. Chapter 8

Chihana walked back into Grimmjow's room.

"Where were you?"

"None of your business."

"Where's your sword?"

"Somewhere outside. I think."

He blinked.

"Why is your sword outside?"

"Because I threw it there. Duh."

"And why did you throw it there...?"

"Because I felt like it."

"Don't you need your sword?"

"No. I can fight without my sword."

"How well can you fight without your sword?"

"What do you want? Quit asking me questions. It's annoying."

He looked over towards the door.

"You did a nice job fixing the door."

"Yeah, the door _you_ were supposed to fix."

He smiled.

"I couldn't have fixed it as well."

"Sure. We'll go with that."

They stood in silence.

Chihana sighed.

"Is it always so boring around here?!"

"Pretty much, yeah."

"Well that sucks..."

"I know something we can do to pass the time."

He grinned wolfishly.

"Freak! I'm so not!"

"You didn't even hear what I was going to suggest."

"I think I know pretty well what you were going to suggest!"

"Cleaning?"

"Lier."

"I am not lying."

His grin got bigger.

"Gah! I'm not having sex with you!"

"It'll be fun."

"Pervert! No!"

"You liked it when I was kissing you."

"That's different!"

He walked closer to her.

"Back away. You are so within my personal space bubble!"

She made an X with her arms in front of her.

He continued walking.

"Quit it! Go away!"

She started walking backwards.

"You're cute when you're angry."

She blushed.

"Erm, thanks?"

She hit the wall.

He put his arms around her.

"Let go. I don't like you."

"Now you're lying."

"..."

"You're not very good at lying."

"It's not my fault..."

"You're sword's not even here to bug you. Are you sure you don't want to?"

She considered this.

"I-I don't know..."

"Please?"

"Are you begging?"

"Yes..."

"Um..."

"I really do like you, Chihana."

She looked at him.

It certainly didn't _seem_ like he was lying...

"Yeah, but..."

He kissed her.

"What?"

"I don't what it's like losing your virginity..."

"It's not bad. It's actually kinda fun."

"And how would you know?!"

"I'm, uh, just guessing..."

She frowned at him.

He smiled hopefully.

She sighed.

"Does that mean yes?"

"I don't know, Grimmjow...I'm not ready for this..."

"I'll make you ready."

He gently licked her neck, and then kissed her again.

"I hate you..."

"I know you do."

She smiled.

He picked her up, and sat her down on the bed.

He climbed on top of her, and began kissing her again.

He slid her shirt off.

She moaned softly.

He growled.

"You sound like a cat. Are you going to purr?"

"Maybe. Depends on how this goes."

He took of his shirt.

She grabbed him and pulled him closer.

"Me-yow..."

* * *

"So what are you supposed to talk about when you're having sex?"

Grimmjow removed his lips from her breast to answer.

"Talk? I don't think you're supposed to talk."

"Well, unlike you, my lips don't get to be occupied the entire time. What am I supposed to do?"

"Breathe."

A wave of pleasure passed through her, and she moaned loudly.

"And do that. Talking ain't necessary."

She frowned.

"This isn't fair. You're having all the fun."

He grinned.

"Fun? I haven't even started the fun yet."

"Great."

He nuzzled her neck gently.

His hands tightened around her wrists.

"I'm not planning to escape or anything. You don't need to hold me to the bed."

He ignored her.

"I'm not worried about you escaping."

"What, then?"

He released her wrists, and wrapped his arms around her body.

"Maybe I like holding you."

He licked the sweat off of her face.

"I can't decide whether I like that, or whether it's completely disgusting."

He laughed.

Then he laid his head down on her chest, and began to purr.

* * *

Chihana woke up.

She was curled up next to Grimmjow.

She couldn't believe last night's events had actually taken place.

"Ugh."

"Good morning. Sleep well?"

She looked up at him.

He had his signature proud grin on his face.

"Sleep? I don't recall sleeping last night."

"You did, for a couple hours."

She yawned.

"I need a nap."

"You need to get up."

She glared at him.

"Why?"

"You can't sleep all day. You've already been asleep most of the morning."

She looked at him.

He was already fully clothed, and wide awake.

"Bastard..."

She trudged out of the bed, and got dressed.

"I don't see the point of this if nothing happens all day...I thought the afterlife was supposed to be peaceful."

He laughed.

"Yeah, well, we belong in hell."

"I'd rather go there than here! At least they probably have things to do in hell..."

"We have things to do here."

"I'm not having sex with you again today."

"I didn't mean that."

"Uh-huh."

"Aizen actually assigned you a mission."

She stared at him.

"When?"

"This morning. While you were asleep."

"How do you know this?"

"He knocked on the door. I opened it, and he told me "I am assigning Chihana a mission."

"Smartass."

He grinned.

"He also gave this to me."

He threw her sword at her.

"Said you'd need it."

_I am NOT talking to you._

"Good. Then I can have some peace and quiet. Everyone wins."

_How could you throw me out a WINDOW?! You BITCH! You fucking bitch! I HATE you!_

"Your time outside made you a little edgy, huh?"

_BITCH! MOTHERFUCKER! MEANIE!_

"Yep."

_I can finally understand why you cuss so much. It really does get all of your anger out. _

"But I assume you're not making it a habit?"

_Nope. That's your thing. I'm done now._

"That's nice. Well, we have a mission, let's go."

_Okay._

She walked towards the door.

"What, you're just going to leave without saying anything to me?"

She looked at Grimmjow.

"Goodbye?"

He kissed her.

"Be careful."

"I will, mom."

"Very funny."

"I thought so."

She walked out the door.

"Love ya."

"Uh-huh. You too."

She blew him a kiss.

_Whoa. What the hell happened when I was out?_

"None of your business."

_You had sex didn't you?_

She blushed.

"So? It was his fault..."

_Sure it was..._

"Do you know what kind of mission Aizen wants to send me on?"

_I think you have to observe some kid named Ichigo Kurosaki._

She grimaced.

"Sounds like fun. Observing. Whoop-dee-do."

_And he's making you drag me along. So at least you'll have company._

"I'd prefer anyone for company rather than you."

_Really? Anyone at all?_

"Yeah. Pretty much."

_You're not nice._

She walked in the room.

"Chihana. I hope Grimmjow told you why you're here."

"Some sort of mission?"

"Yes. But I'm not sending you alone. Nnoitra will be going with you."

Nnoitra, Nnoitra. Why did that sound familiar?

"Nice to see you again, girl."

She looked over.

Oh yeah. Now she remembered why it sounded familiar.

_He was the guy that attacked you in the hallway, right?_

_Yeah, and now I have to go on a fucking mission with him?!_

_Such is life._

_Well, life sucks!_

A disturbing grin spread across Nnoira's face.

This was going to be such fun.

* * *

Sorry for not putting anything up in a while. I've been really busy. I'm sorry this Chapter was short, but I wanted to end it here. I'll make Chapter 9 longer to make up for this one. It should be up sometime soon. I hope you enjoyed, don't forget to review!


	9. Chapter 9

Christ, has it been _that_ long since I've updated?! Wow...Really sorry to everyone who's been waiting...It really sucks when life catches up to you. You can't do any of the important stuff, like typing up fanfiction, you're forced to do homework and projects and stuff...which I should technically be doing now. Oh well. Here's Chapter 9. Oh yeah, don't remember if I put this in my other chapters, but I don't own Bleach or anything else I talk about. Duh.

* * *

Oh god.

She was going with _Nnoitra_?!

No way. No way. No fucking way.

"Um, Aizen-sama?"

"Yes?"

"Do I have to go with Nnoitra?"

"Is that a problem?"

"Uh, well..."

"Then you shall depart immediately."

Shit.

* * *

Surprisingly, Nnoitra hadn't said anything so far.

In fact, he hadn't even done anything.

All they were supposed to be doing was watching some kid whose name she'd forgotten.

So they were sitting in a hotel room. Doing absolutely nothing.

"So...Your name's Nnoitra, right?"

He nodded.

Silence.

"Um, what are you doing?"

"Thinking of ways to torture you."

She shuddered.

"Um, well, at least you're honest..."

"I wouldn't be too happy about that if I were you."

He grinned.

The sick, twisted, Nnoitra grin.

She shuddered again.

"So, uh, what are you planning on doing to me?"

"You really wanna know?"

"Not really...Just trying to make conversation before you kill me..."

"Killing you? That'd be too easy. I was thinking we could at least have some fun together first."

_Freaky..._

"That is SO wrong! I'm not doing ANYTHING with you!"

"Not of your free will, anyways."

"I'll kill you first!"

"I'd like to see you try."

"You disgusting pervert!"

"Shut up. You're annoying."

She shut her mouth.

She figured the worse she ticked him off, the worse her time here would be.

He stared at her curiously, still grinning.

"Acting like an obedient little puppy. Scared of me?"

"No."

"That's good."

"That's good?"

"I'd much rather you be terrified of me. The ones that are really scared are so much more fun to play with."

_I'd make for the nearest window as quickly as possible._

_Nah, I think I'd rather stay here with Mr. Creepy Rapist._

_Seriously? I knew there was something wrong with your head._

"Oh just SHUT THE FUCK UP!"

She clamped her hand over her mouth quickly.

_Oh shit, I just said that out loud, didn't I?_

_Yep. Good luck explaining that one._

_Fuck..._

She looked over at Nnoitra.

He was giving her the Um-Are-You-Insane-Or-Something look.

"I didn't say anything."

"I, uh, wasn't talking to you..."

"So, you're just complete insane then?"

"Well...not _completely_...maybe half..."

"Only half?"

"Er, nine-tenths, then..."

"I can live with that."

* * *

Nnoitra was asleep.

Apparently he had gotten tired of waiting for her to fall asleep.

And she certainly wasn't going to fall asleep, heaven knows what he'd do to her while she was sleeping.

_So, tired yet?_

"Shut up, Koutetsu..."

_Hey, you've been awake the whole day. You do need sleep._

"Do not..."

_Well, if you're not going to sleep, why not try escaping?_

"What? Why?"

_Uh, so you're not in an apartment with 'Mr. Creepy Rapist'?_

"And how am I supposed to do that?"

_He opened a window while you were sleeping._

"I was sleeping?"

_Only for a few minutes during the day. You dozed off._

"And he didn't do anything to me?"

She started to feel guilty.

_Ah, no...He didn't notice soon enough. He saw your eyes closed and grinned really freaky-like, but the you woke up._

The guilt left.

"A window, huh?"

She glanced towards the window.

_It's open enough. You could jump out._

"And kill myself? No, thank you."

_You wouldn't kill yourself._

"Um, aren't we on like, the eighth floor of this stupid complex?"

_No. Only the second._

"No way. You're lying."

_Nuh-uh. Just go jump. Or would you rather stay here and snuggle with Nnoitra?_

"Snuggle?! What the fuck is the matter with you?!"

_There's nothing wrong with me. Besides the fact I'm a spirit. In your sword. Which most would find very disturbing._

"Oh, shut up..."

_I refuse. It's simply my nature._

"I thought the sword's nature was supposed to follow the owner's."

_Would you believe you used to be like me?_

"Never."

_Yeah. You're right. I guess that means I'm just odd._

"I figured that out a long time ago."

_Hey! Not nice alert!_

"Yeah, well, fuck you. Have I ever been nice?"

_No..._

She looked at the window again.

Then at Nnoitra. He was still asleep.

_He could wake up at any time..._

_I know..._

She sighed.

What what she even running away from?

_Um, Nnoitra?_

_Yeah, but...I'm not in any danger now...And he'd just get mad._

_But you're bored, right?_

_Yeah..._

_So go out. Go get some food. Or alcohol or something._

_And come back drunk? Then I'd really would have sex with him. **Willingly.**_

_Well, whatever. Just go out. I'm bored too!_

She got up and walked towards the window.

She looked back at Nnoitra.

Asleep.

She stepped out.

And fell eight stories.

_Huh. I guess you were on the eighth floor._

"I KNEW you were lying!"

_Well, you're alive._

She looked down.

Her gigai was wearing a normal gray shirt and blue jeans.

They didn't seem to be damaged.

But she did have a large cut across her forehead, which was bleeding profusely.

"Great...Now what?"

_Well, you could ignore it and have it get infected and then you die._

"Um."

_Or, you could go ask someone on the street for help._

"Why would anyone b on the street at night?"

_Technically, it's not night. It's like, five in the morning._

"Really?"

_Yeah, see? The sun's rising over there._

So it was.

"Well then, I guess I should start walking."

_I guess so._

She started walking.

"So, do I just stop at a house and ask for a bandage or what?"

_For starters, talk to me mentally. Or they might send you to the Funny Farm. Talking to yourself and all._

_Okay..._

_And YOU aren't picking the house. I will pick the house for you to get help at!  
_

_Uh, why?_

_Because you have a terrible sense of judgment._

_If you say so._

She continued walking.

_Here! Stop here!  
_

_Why here?_

_Because I said so._

There was a large sign over the building that read "URAHARA SHOTEN."

Two little kids were out front, playing some sort of game.

She approached them.

"Um, excuse me?"

They stopped and looked at her.

"Do you happen to have a bandage on hand?"

"You're bleeding!"

"I know...That's why I'd like a bandage..."

"Like, a LOT."

She put her hand to her forehead. It was covered in blood.

_Oh dear. You really ARE bleeding quite a lot. It's kind of covering your entire face...And dripping on your shirt..._

_I blame you, you took too long finding a place to get help._

"I'll be okay. I just need something to stop the bleeding..."

She suddenly felt very woozy.

_Are you going to faint? You've lost a lot of blood._

_I dunno...probab...ly..._

She fell over.

"Hey girl! Are you okay?"

_No you moron, I just like lying on the ground..._

_Ah, Chihana. On the verge of losing consciousness, and you still have your sarcasm._

_Shut up..._

* * *

She woke up in a room.

"Ugh. What happened?"

_Well, the kids went in and got up help, then this guy came in and treated your wound. I suspect he'll be back in a few minutes, he went to go get you some water._

The door opened.

A man in a striped hat was holding a glass of water.

"Ah, you're awake."

"Um, yes. Thank you..."

"Sure. What's your name?"

_I wouldn't tell him your real name. Use a different name._

_Like what?! I suck at making up names!_

_Um, um...I dunno...come back to me._

"Um, I don't remember..."

"You'll probably remember soon. You did take quite a hit to the head."

"Mmm."

She drank some water.

_Well, stupid, NAME?!_

_Uh, Nayru. Oracle of Ages._

_Something NOT from Zelda..._

_Ergh, Mary Kate?_

_No..._

_Gwen Stefani?_

_..._

_...Lady Gaga?_

_Oh, come ON._

_Beyonce? _

_Just something normal..._

_Hum....Ziva David?_

_...I meant original._

_Oh._

_Anything?_

_Jane Doe._

_..._

_Lyn Smith._

_...Is that the best you can do? _

_Hmph. Yori Shira?_

_Good enough._

_I would've gone with Gwen Stefani. You ain't no hollaback girl-_

_Honestly. JUST SHUT UP._

_Feh._

"Remember your name?"

"Um, Yori Shira."

"Nice to meet you Yori. How did you hurt your head?"

"I, uh, fell. Out a window."

"...How far?"

"Oh, only eight stories."

"..."

"I thought we were on the second floor. Someone misinformed me."

"I see..."

"Yep..."

_Koutetsu's conversation ice breakers! Question 1: Who was your childhood hero?_

_Ugh. Shut up._

_Question 2: Do you think Chihana is really reall-_

_SHUT UP!_

"Ah, well thank you for helping me Mr...."

"Urahara. Kisuke Urahara."

"Mr. Urahara. I should be going..."

_Going? Why?_

_Well, I'm not staying here._

She walked out towards the door.

"Well, thank you again-"

She ran into someone in the door.

A boy with orange hair.

_Clumsy. Look where you're walking._

"Ah, sorry..."

"It's fine. Who are you?"

"Uh."

_Yori Shira...One of these days I'm going to give you a book with everyone's names in it. You really can't remember names at all._

_Shut up..._

"Yori Shira."

"Ichigo Kurosaki."

That rung a bell.

_That sounds familiar. Koutetsu, why does that sound familiar?_

_Because he's the Soul Reaper You and Nnoitra are supposed to be watching._

_Oh. Fuck..._

"Um, nice to meet you Ichigo..."

"You too. I haven't seen you around. You new here?"

"Er, yeah."

_You're a traveling clown. _

_He's not gonna believe that-Clown?!_

_Just throwing ideas...How about...You're staying here with your brother-_

_Nnoitra does not get to be my older brother._

_Boyfriend?  
_

_COUSIN._

_Fine. You're staying here with your cousin on...vacation._

_Why? There's nothing here._

_Uh, road trip. This is your stop now._

_Sure..._

_It's better than 'Hi I'm an Arrancar in a gigai here to watch your every move! May I kill you now?'_

_Oh, just shut up..._

_Pft._

"I'm, uh, here with my...cousin on...vacation. Road trip, y'know."

"Cool."

_Whoa. He totally bought it. What a moron._

_You can thank my story expertise!_

_Thank you? You're the one that picked this shop in the first place. If I picked, I wouldn't even have met him._

_Uh, you have reached Koutetsu's residence. Please leave a message at the tone of the beep. Beeeeep._

_Funny._

"So Yori, why are you here?"

He looked at Kisuke.

"I hurt my head."

She pushed her bangs out of the way to reveal the bandage on her head.

"Ow. What'd you do?"

"I, uh, fell out of our hotel room...eight stories...no big deal..."

"No big deal?"

"Yeah. I've had worse."

"Have you had a tour of the city?"

"What? Uh. No..."

"Would you like one?"

_Aw, he likes you!_

_He better not..._

_I think he does! I smell love in the air!~_

_He can't! He's a fucking SOUL REAPER! I'm an ARRANCAR!_

_Ah, the tragic story of love. I can't, I live a different life! Like the vampire falling for the human!_

_What?! _

_Romeo, Romeo, where for art thou Romeo?_

_Who's Romeo?_

_First comes love, then comes marriage..._

_No way! I already had sex with Grimmjow! I'm no slut!_

_Two doesn't make you a slut, honey. Everybody and their brother, now THAT makes you slut._

_Shut up!_

_Another can't hurt._

_SHUT UP!_

_You got somethin' good girl, all the guys want a piece of it. I'd let them have it, 'specially if they're cute like this one here!~_

_FUCK-SHUT UP! You're like TRYING to get me to have sex with everyone!_

_So? Most girls want to. They'd be jumping on a chance like this._

_I'M NOT JUMPING ON ANYONE!_

_That's what you say now...~_

_FUCK YOU!  
_

_No baby, I'm not getting fucked, you are.~  
_

_BITCH!_

_Hey, you still don't know if I'm officially a boy or a girl._

_THEN YOU'RE A BASTARD TOO!_

_I can live with that._

"Yori? Are you okay?"

"Huh? Who?"

"You...You've got the weirdest expression on your face...Like horror and annoyance..."

_Oh god, my facial expression changes when I talk to you?!  
_

_Well, yah, what'd ya think was gunna happen?_

_Fuck...And who's Yori?_

_...You...That's your fake name, Yori Shira, you really don't remember?  
_

_...Oh._

"I, uh, sorry, um...."

"Ichigo..."

"Right. I'm terrible with names. I can't even remember my own sometimes..."

_Mostly because it's not your name._

_Shut up._

"So, um, a tour would be nice...if you'd still like to take the insane woman..."

He laughed.

"Sure. I like insane people. You should meet my family and friends."

"Well, that's good."

He smiled.

_Oh hell, he really is cute..._

_Chitty-chitty-BANG-BANG baby!_

_You did NOT just say that..._

_I like, TOTALLY just did._

_You suck..._

_You're gonna be suckin' something pretty soon..._

_Jesus CHRIST. What happened to you, you got all perverted..._

_Just revealing your inner thoughts._

_Inner thoughts my ass..._

_Speaking of your ass,-_

_DON'T even go there._

They started out.

"Ah, thank you again, Mr. Urahara!"

"Sure, sure. You two cuties just go along now.~"

He winked.

Chihana's face turned red.

Ichigo glared.

_I like Mr. Urahara. He's a lot like me._

_Except way more kind..._

_Hey!  
_

"So, why are you and your cousin on a road trip?"

"Um, just to get a little change of scenery."

"Sounds like fun. Where are you from?"

"Eh..."

_Koutetsu!  
_

_What?_

_Where was I born?!_

_Um. Australia?_

"A-"

_Wait, Australia?!_

_No no, America? I dunno..._

_Ugh..._

"A-merica..."

"America?"

"Yeah, well, I grew up in Japan somewhere, but I moved to America for a little...And now I'm back..."

"How long were you in America?"

"Uh. A couple months."

"Neat."

_Now why don't you ask him some questions? Gather info on the enemy! Wasn't that why you were here in the first place?_

_How? 'Say, I...'_

_Ichigo...._

_'Say, Ichigo, what do you do out of school? Are you a Soul Reaper?'_

_Well, the first part's okay, but don't ask him if he's a Soul Reaper..._

_How do I get him to tell me?  
_

_Use your 'feminine charm.' Bond with him. Get real close. Then rip his heart out when he finds out your an Arrancar and just using him for information._

_Harsh..._

_I know._

_I like it. I haven't been very evil lately._

_That's why I suggested it!~_

_I didn't know you were so cruel._

_Oh sure. I love blood and gore and death! Have I ever told about the time-_

_Save it._

_Fine. Meany._

"So Ichigo, what do you do?"

"What do you mean?"

"Like, do you have a job or a hobby outside of school? Well, assuming you're _in_ school."

"Um, I guess I do, but it's not really worth talking about. You?"

_You HAVE to try harder than that. Bat your eyelashes or something._

_That's so prissy. I'd rather 'accidentally' rip off my shirt and show him my breasts._

_THAT would certainly do the trick!_

_I wasn't SERIOUS!_

"Oh, I don't really do anything. I write and read."

"Where do you go to school?"

"I finished school a long time ago-"

_Uh, you TRYING to tell him you're already dead?!_

"-because I was so smart I, uh, skipped a lot of grades and went straight to college."

"Oh. Are you done with college?"

"Er, yeah."

"Where did you go?"

_Don't look at me, I don't know any modern colleges._

"I took one of those online courses...I don't remember the name."

_You need to start asking the questions._

_How?! He's like the master at changing the subject!_

_Well-_

A hollow appeared in the area.

_Oh, fantastic. How am I gonna go kill it?_

_NO! I HAVE THE PERFECT PLAN!_

_Um. Okay._

_He goes off to fight it, you lure it towards you without him noticing, then you act all scared!  
_

_Ah-_

_NOT DONE!  
_

_Sorry..._

_And you're all like 'What was that? Why were you fighting it?' Then he'll be all 'Oh shit she can she spirits!' Then he'll tell you he's a Soul Reaper, and you egg more information out of him!_

_That sounds so stupid. What if just erases my memory?_

_Psh. You'll still remember._

_But then he'll know I'm _not_ human, if the thing doesn't work on me._

_He's an amateur. He'll just think he did it wrong._

_If this doesn't work, I'll throw you out another window._

_Whatever. It'll work._

"Uh, Yori, could you stay here? I'll be right back."

"O-Okay!"

He ran off.

"Now, where's the hollow? And how do I lure it?"

_Release a tiny bit of your energy. It should come running._

"How?"

_Fine, I'll do it for you._

The hollow came around a corner and right at her.

_Now act all scared!_

_Do I have to?_

_YES!_

_Fine._

She screamed, and ran away.

_Go slower. It'll lose you. Actually, trip. It's more damsel-in-distress-ish._

_You owe me._

She tripped purposely.

The hollow lunged at her.

_If this thing hurts me because Ichigo doesn't show up, you are dead._

_Um, okay...Ichigo! Don't let me down!  
_

_Like he can hear you._

But, apparently he could, because Ichigo came up and sliced the hollow in half.

_Go on, now stutter his name all feeble-like._

"I-Ichigo?"

His eyes widened.

"You can see me?"

_Ignore his question._

_Yeah, yeah. I got it. When I need my line, I'll say._

"Ichigo, what was that thing?"

"A-A hollow."

"And you're..."

"A, um, Soul Reaper."

"Is this your hobby you said wasn't worth talking about?"

"Um, yeah."

"How did you get your clothes changed so quickly?"

"Well, this is my soul. Could, could I go get back into my body and finish talking to you then?"

"Um, sure."

Ichigo left.

_See? See! My plan worked perfectly!  
_

_Hmph._

"Yori?"

She jumped.

"Oh, it's just you, Ichigo."

"Would you mind not telling anyone about this?"

"Of course! You saved my life, I'd do anything for you, Ichigo!"

She hugged him, deliberately shoving her breasts in his face.

His face turned red.

_And now the slut part comes into play._

_The fun part._

"U-Um, Yori?"

"Sorry, am I making you uncomfortable?"

"No, I just kind of can't breathe..."

"Oh! I'm so sorry!"

She released him.

"It's okay..."

_Score!~_

Chihana noticed the sun setting.

_Uh, Koutetsu?_

_Hmm?  
_

_When were we supposed to go back to Las Noches?_

_At sundown-Oh shit..._

_Do you think Nnoitra left me here?  
_

_Uh, probably._

She groaned.

"Yori?"

"Um, I think my cousin left me here..."

"How could he do that?"

"He said we were leaving at sundown, and if I wasn't back he'd leave me here..."

"That's kind of cruel."

"He's not my favorite cousin..."

"Well, I guess you'll just have to stay here."

She looked up and smiled at him.

"Then it's not all bad."

But really it was.

How the hell was she getting back?!

* * *

_*In Las Noches*_

"So Nnoitra, you're telling me you just left her there?"

"Yeah. I lost her."

"How do you lose a girl?"

"It's her fault. She jumped out the fucking window."

"Didn't you go and look for her?"

"No."

"Why?"

"What did she ever do for me?! She attacked me! I don't care what happened to her!"

"What if she died?"

"What if she did! Then I'd be a lot happier!"

"Nnoitra..."

"I'm NOT going after her. Send someone else."

Nnoitra stomped out of the room.

Aizen sighed.

"Someone has to go see what she's doing..."

"Why don't ya send Grimmjow? I'm sure he'd be happy ta check up on his girlfriend."

"I'll send him off tomorrow."

* * *

I told you Chapter 9 would be long. My other chapters only took up five to eleven pages on OpenOffice. This one took up...21. I could've divided it up, but hey, I'm lazy...Hope you enjoyed and all that. Remember to review and everything. Be nice to your mother. Go give your dog a dog biscuit. Comb your hair. Uh, always brush and floss your teeth. Say no to drugs. Live well, laugh often, love much. Don't judge books by their covers. Don't blather on about random stuff that has absolutely nothing to do with anything, and that nobody really cares about at the end of one of your fanfiction stories. If you do all that, you should be okay. And if you don't have a dog, then GET ONE. Cause I'm sure your cat doesn't want a dog biscuit. And neither does your fish. Or lizard, or snake, or mouse, or whatever. And if you don't have a dog, then why the heck do you even have dog biscuits?! There's something wrong with you. But we already knew that, because you're reading my story. :)

And there's also something very wrong with me. But you knew that, too. Peace, y'all.


	10. Chapter 10

Oh yeah. Just for the record, I don't know when exactly all this takes place. It's just the perfect time period where everything works out perfectly. No Rukia in the closet, Grimmjow's got his arms, uh...well, whatever...Just wanted to get that out there. I DON'T OWN BLEACH. Derp.

* * *

"Uh, Ichigo?"

"Yeah?"

"Where am I supposed to stay? I don't have any money..."

"You could stay at my house."

_Woo-hoo. First date and you're already allowed in his room. Nice!_

_Oh, just shut up. I don't believe Nnoitra actually left me here..._

_Hey, he's a bastard._

_No duh..._

"I don't want to be a burden to your family or anything...seems awfully rude to me..."

"Nah, they won't mind."

"Who all lives at your house?"

"My dad and my sisters."

"What about your mother?"

"My mother died when I was young."

"Oh...I'm so sorry...I shouldn't have asked..."

"You didn't know. What about your parents?"

_Gee, Koutetsu, what about my parents?_

_Hey, can't tell you. Classified. But they are dead._

"Both of my parents are dead...I've kind of been living on my own my whole life."

"I'm sorry..."

"S'okay. Are you sure I can stay at your place?"

"It's not a problem, really."

"Because I can always sleep out on the sidewalk."

"I'm not going to let you sleep on a sidewalk."

"They really aren't all that uncomfortable."

"Yori..."

"Really, after a while your back just kind of goes numb, and then it doesn't hurt anymore!"

"Do you have a fear of houses or something?"

"Yes."

"Why...?"

"Uh, because when I was a kid my cousin told me a story about a haunted house. And then I fell down the stairs. And then I got taken to the hospital. I broke my leg. And I moped around for like, a year before everything healed. But, it all comes back...to the...house...I guess..."

"Um, so you're scared of houses because of a story?"

"No, it's because I broke my leg in my house."

"So why don't you have a fear of stairs?"

"Because my cousin told me that story. See?"

"Uh, no. This is hard."

"That's what she said."

"...What?"

"Never mind...Okay, I was lying..."

"I figured that..."

"So I guess I have to stay at your house."

"I guess so."

He smiled.

_Well, that was about __**the worst**__ thing you could have come up with. I'm sorry, but you __**really**__ suck..._

_That was pretty pathetic..._

_Do I have to do everything?_

_Er, no, you just have to think. I'm like, do all the walking and stuff._

_True. You should ask him if he likes puppies._

_Uh. Why?_

_Because everyone likes puppies! If he doesn't, he's a bad person!_

"Um. Do you like puppies?"

"...Why?"

"Oh, no reason..."

"Uh, sure?"

*SILENCE*

_Oh my god. You ACTUALLY asked him. You ARE stupid..._

_You said to!_

_Have you EVER listened to anything I say?! You must be sick!  
_

_I do feel a little weird._

_Probably because you're intentionally using a cute defenseless boy to get information. You're going to be sexually seducing him and then he'll fall in love with you and then you'll rip his heart. Literally and figuratively._

_...Sounds painful._

_Extremely so._

_..._

_..._

_..._

_Well?? Are you gonna say something??_

_No. I don't have anything to say._

_Ichi probably thinks you're insane now. You just ask him if he likes puppies then shut up._

_Hey, that was your fault-Ichi?!_

_Ichi, Grimmy, ChiChi, Nnoity, Ulqui, Ginny, and so on..._

_Disturbing...what about Aizen?_

_Uh. Aizeny? Aizy...? Hmm. I'll have to think about that. Get back to me._

_Um, sure._

"Yori? Are you okay?"

"Huh? Yeah, I'm fine?"

"You were just silent for a while and...making interesting expressions..."

"Oh...I was just...thinking. About...life..."

"Okay...Anyway, we're at my house..."

She looked up from the ground.

"Should I go in?"

"Um, yes. That's kind of why I brought you here."

"O-Of course..."

_Epic fail. What kind of question was that?_

_Shut up..._

_It's like someone offering you ice cream. 'Should I eat it?' No, you just get to STARE at it._

_Shut up. Go fuck yourself._

_That's what SHE said. I don't believe you said that either..._

_Fuck off...You're stupid._

_So's your MOM._

_So's your FACE!  
_

_THAT'S WHAT SHE SAID!_

_Oh no you did-ent!_

_O yes I d-id!_

_You're gay!  
_

_I know you are, but what am I?_

_AND YOUR POINT WOULD BE?!_

_SO'S YOUR MOM!  
_

_THAT'S WHAT SHE SAID!_

OH YEAH?

YEAH!  


_WELL THEN!  
_

_Okay...this went way off track..._

_That's what she sa-_

_Don't. Just don't...We sound like seventh grade girls yelling random stupid things..._

_Good point._

Luckily, the shouting only lasted a few seconds, so Ichigo failed to noticed Yori's/Chihana's inner conflict....

She walked in the house.

"Welcome home, Ichigo! Oh, who's this?"

A small girl was cooking something.

Another girl sat at the table. She looked older.

"Yori. She's a friend of mine. She's gonna stay here."

"Oh, okay! I'm Yuzu, that's Karin!"

_He's got two sisters. Yuzu and Karin._

_Okay. So?_

_You're supposed to be collecting information. They could be used as hostages._

_Two little girls? Harsh. I like it._

"Nice to meet you both."

Yuzu smiled. Karin ignored everything.

_This is gonna be fun._

* * *

She ate the food Yuzu made. She had met Ichigo's father. She bathed. And now...

"Why the hell do I have to dress in _his_ clothes?!" she mumbled, looking in the mirror.

_Well, are you going to wear your filthy clothes to bed? Besides, he's the same size as you._

"With a few major differences...."

She was wearing one of Ichigo's t-shirts, and a simple pair of sweat pants.

But they were made for boys...

Her breasts wear incredibly tight in the shirt, and it made them look rather large...

The pants clung to the figure of her legs oddly, fluttering around where they curved, and stretching over the bigger parts like her hips.

"My hips are _not_ that big..."

_Szayel made the gigai. He hasn't seen your body enough._

"Thank god...But still...I look..."

_Extremely sexy for wearing a t-shirt and sweat pants._

"They were made for boys! It's not my fault!"

_Did you expect the kid to have girl's clothes with him?!_

"...Ugh. What's he gonna say?"

_Probably nothing. He'll just stare at you a lot and blush._

She sighed and walked out of the bathroom and to Ichigo's room, where she was regretfully staying.

"He's even going to be in the same room as me when I'm sleeping..."

_It'll give you experience._

She went in Ichigo's room.

"Um, so should I sleep the floor?"

Ichigo looked up.

His face turned a deep red.

_Told you._

_Hmm...I'm tired..._

_You have to keep up conversation._

_Do it for me..._

_...Five minutes. Then you gotta think for yourself._

"U-Uh, I'll sleep on the floor, you can have my bed..."

_Oh, but I don't want you to give up your bed just for me..._

_Mh..._

"Oh, but I don't want you to give up your bed just for me..."

"It's fine, really..."

_I'll sleep on the floor._

"I'll sleep on the floor."

Koutetsu thought of a great idea to further progress this fun.

"You can't sleep on the floor..."

_But you can't possibly be comfortable sleeping on the floor._

"But you can't possibly be comfortable sleeping on the floor."

"Well, not really...but..."

Koutetsu grinned evilly internally.

_Y-You could always sleep on the bed with **me**, K-Kurosaki-kun..._

"Y-You could always sleep on the bed with **me**, K-Kurosaki-kun..."

Ichigo's face returned to a bright red.

Chihana suddenly realized what Koutetsu had just told her to say.

_WHAT THE FUCK?!_

_Hey, you asked me to think for you._

_I'M NEVER DOING THAT AGAIN!  
_

_I told you you would gain experience. Too late now. You get to sleep with him..._

_I don't WANT to sleep with him!_

_Gain information. Guys talk most when they're in bed with a girl in tight clothes. And they're HIS clothes, too._

_So?_

_It just adds something. There's a girl I like in MY clothes. Kinda sexy._

Chihana blushed.

"Um, I-I, mean, only if you're comfortable with that, Ichigo..."

She twirled a strand of her hair around her finger, and her other hand played with her shirt.

"U-Uh, s-sure, I guess..."

She walked slowly over to his bed and sat down next to him.

Her breasts rubbed against his arm as she leaned on him.

She breathed on his neck.

"You're really hot, Ichigo. Is something wrong?"

_Gee, I dunno. A girl's like, sexually harrassing him..._

_Psh. I KNOW that...this is your fault...._

_At least he's cute._

_...True._

"A-Ah, n-nothing's wrong..."

"Okay. Goodnight."

She laid down on the bed, taking up as little space as possible.

Ichigo looked confused.

_Uh, what just happened?!_

_I'm trying to sleep._

_YOU'RE NOT SUPPOSED TO SLEEP! YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO-_

_Have sex with him? No, thanks._

_Not necessarily have sex with him...Just get more information out of him..._

_It can wait. I'm tired._

_Hmph._

* * *

So. Chapter 10. You know the whole review deal. Of course, most everyone ignores it anyway. PLEAZ! I NEEDZ REVIEWZ! OR I DIEZ! THEN YOU WON'T KNOW THE END OF THE STORY! Ahem. I'd also appreciate any questions for Koutetsu. I was thinking about doing a Q&A session with Koutetsu. So any questions you'd like to offer will be used. Don't have a deadline yet. I'll put one in the next chapter. I'd really like some questions, I don't care if they're your homework questions, I just want some cause my made up questions suck. So, if you write 'Wahts 4 timez 3' I don't really care. I JUST NEED QUESTIONZ. Please and thank you, love and kisses to all who actually care about reading this - KrazyKyuubi


	11. Chapter 11

This will hopefully be the new pagebreaks. **!#$%^&***

**!#$%^&*!#$%^&*!#$%^&*#$%^&*!#$%^&*!#$%^&*!#$%^&*!#$%^&*!**

The next morning she woke up in an awkward position.

She had her arms wrapped around Ichigo's waist, and one of her legs was draped over him.

Her breasts were pressed up against his chest.

Funny, she was facing away from him when she went to sleep so this wouldn't happen.

It was something you read in a corny romance novel, or a bad fanfiction...

Oh well. She decided to wait for his reaction.

That would be fun to see.

If she didn't fall back asleep.

**!#$%^&*!#$%^&*!#$%^&*#$%^&*!#$%^&*!#$%^&***

Ichigo woke up a few moments later.

He noticed Yori, and immediately blushed.

"Uh, Yori..."

"Mmm...Who?"

"Could you let go of me?"

She squeezed him tighter.

"You don't like me holding you...?"

"U-Uh..."

She buried her face in his chest.

"I still love you..."

"W-What? Yori!"

He shook her.

Her eyes snapped open.

"Ah, good morning Ichigo!"

"Oh, you were asleep..."

"What? What did I say?"

"Er, nothing."

"And your face is all red. Are you sick?"

"No..."

_Koutetsu?_

_..._

_Koutetsu...?_

_...go die in a hole..._

_...What?_

_...mph..._

_Oh, are you asleep?_

_...no mommy...five moar minutez pleaze..._

_Uh. Sure._

_..._

She got up and stretched.

"So, do you have something planned for today?"

"I thought we might find a way to get you back with your cousin..."

"Oh."

"Do you know where he is?"

"Hue-arrisburg"

"Huearrisaburg?"

"Uh, Harrisburg...Maybe. I don't really know."

"Where's Harrisburg?"

"Uh. Pennsylvania?"

"...Is it possible to get from Japan to the United States in nine hours?"

"How should I know? Maybe he took one of those flying things."

"...A plane, you mean?"

"Sure. Or he could've drove."

"...Drove? Um, there's an ocean between us..."

"...I knew that. Ergh..."

"Do you have a phone number or something?"

"Phone? What's a phone?"

"...Oh boy."

_**!#$%^&*!#$%^&*!#$%^&*#$%^&*!#$%^&*!#$%^&*!#$%^&*!#$**

"Oh wow! Phones are so interesting!"

"...How could you not know what a phone is?"

"I don't know a lot of things. I bet you don't know everything."

"But I know what a phone is..."

"Hmph. At least my hair's not orange."

"What's wrong with my hair?"

"Nothing. I just could find anything else to counter with."

"Ugh."

"Oh! I know! How about the fact that you slept with a girl and didn't try to jump her?"

"Why would I do _that_?"

"Most boys would. Oh god, you're not homosexual are you?"

"NO! What kind of person do you think I am?"

"A stupid one! Do you know how to play poker?"

"Why am I stu-poker?"

"Yeah."

"Er, why?"

"Just curious if you're the type who hangs out in casinos and picks up chicks. I kinda doubted it, but I have to make sure."

"...How does me knowing how to play poker tell if I'm that type?"

"You're not in a motorcycle gang? _**-COMPLETELY IGNORING QUESTION-**_"

"...No."

"Drugs?"

"No!"

"Uh...Lion tamer?"

"...I don't understand you at all."

"YES! Mission accomplished!"

"You don't want me to understand you?"

"Nope."

"Why?"

"Because then you'll find out that I'm actually using you to get information for-"

_Oh shit. Did I just say that?  
_

_...Eh?_

_I just told Ichigo I'm using him for information._

_WHAT THE FUCKING HELL? WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT?_

"...Information for what?"

_Ideas! I need ideas!_

_GODDAMN, HOW THE FUCKING HELL STUPID ARE YOU? YOU'RE GONNA GET US FUCKING KILLED! JESUS &#$%*&#%^$*^4%!_

"What was that? Yori?"

_Be quieter, Koutetsu! Ichigo can hear you..._

_WHAT WERE YOU-Really? That's neat. HEY ICHIGOOOO~CAN YOU HEAR ME?_

"...Yes?"

_Oh fuck. He really can hear me. How's that possible?_

_Hell if I know. But I can use it as a distraction._

"Ichigo? Are you okay? You're talking to yourself."

"What? But...don't you hear a voice?"

"No..."

"And why are you getting information on me?"

"What are you talking about?"

"...Didn't you say you were using to get information for something?"

"Uh, no. Seriously, are you okay?"

"Um..."

"Maybe you're just hallucinating from lack of food. I do that all the time."

"You hallucinate when you don't eat?"

"Yup! All the time!"

Ichigo stared at her.

_...That's not usually a quality most guys look for in a girl._

_Oh, shut up._

_Hello! I hallucinate! Won't go out in a dark alley with me and my pocket knife? 3_

_..._

_*Couple walks alone at night* Girl- Oh god a spider on your face! Boy- There's no spider. Girl- *Stabs boy repeatedly thinking there's a spider on him.* **Headlines the next morning- Boy- 16- Stabbed to death walking with his girlfriend. Upon questioning, girl responds "There was a spider! I killed it, and then he just collapsed! It must have bitten him!" Police on the lookout for killer spiders. We strongly encourage you not to walk at night without bug repellent.**_

_...Uh-huh._

_It's a true story._

_Who told you that?_

_**...**_

_That's what I thought._

"Don't worry Ichigo! I'll go get you some food!"

She got up and ran down the stairs and out the door. (She had changed her clothes.)

"...I guess she didn't know we actually have food in the house.."

**!#$%^&*!#$%^&*!#$%^&*#$%^&*!#$%^&*!#$%^&*!#$%^&*!#$%^&*!**

Yori/Chihana had stopped running in front of an alley.

She leaned against the wall.

_You know he probably had food somewhere in the house?_

"I know, but this is probably the only time I'll be away from him."

_So what, you just wanted free time?_

"Basically."

_For what?  
_

"To think about I'm actually going to get my ass back to Hueco Mundo since fucking Nnoitra left me here!"

_Oh._

"Because Hueco Mundo obviously doesn't have a phone number."

_Well, derp. If it did, that'd be creepy._

"Che. The only thing creepy in Hueco Mundo is Nnoitra. And Szayel, Ulquiorra, Zasen..."

_Yeah...pretty much everyone. But not Gin and Grimmjow._

"Well, Gin creeps me out a little, but if I was a stray puppy I'd run gratefully into his arms instead of Zasen's. And Grimmjow still creeps me out, but not as much as anyone else."

"How do I creep you out?"

She turned around.

Grimmjow was standing-well, floating, since he wasn't in a gigai, behind her.

She stared at him blankly, then turned back to Koutetsu.

"And his hair's blue. That's just not natural."

_Yes, yes. That would scare most people._

"Plus, he's got blue around his eyes. Does he wear eye shadow or something?"

_I've wondered about that for a while._

"Maybe it's a tattoo. Or could just be gay and wear eye shadow.

_I think it's the latter._

"I thought so too. Of course, if he's gay then why does he keep hitting on me?"

_Hmm. Maybe he's just confused._

"That wouldn't surprise me. He's confused a lot. But that tends to happen when your brain's really small."

"I don't appreciate these comments. And stop talking like I'm not here!"

"Why are you here anyway?"

"To take you back?"

"I don't want to go back yet."

"Why?"

"Because I'm getting information out of Ichigo."

"You mean that stupid orange-haired Soul Reaper? What'd you do, sleep with him?"

"Yes. I did sleep with with him."

"...YOU _SLEPT_ WITH _HIM_?"

"Yep."

"WHAT THE FUCK?"

"Geez. I only slept with him. I never said we had sex."

Grimmjow glared at her.

"I enjoyed it, too.~ He's really cuddly."

"You talk about him like he's a fucking plush toy."

"He kind of is! He's cute."

"I'm gonna go kill him."

"And he also-What? Don't go kill him!"

"Why?"

"Because that won't make me happy?"

"Like I care. I'm not that nice."

She grabbed his arm.

"Oh come on, I'm only joking Grimmjow!"

He looked at her.

"...I still want to kill him."

"Why?"

"Because you're mine."

She paused.

"I'm not a dog."

"Really? You look like one."

She hit him.

"I hate you."

"If you hate me so much, you can just go be with your new boyfriend."

She burst out laughing.

"Hey? What's the matter with you?"

"My boyfriend? Oh god, that's too funny. He's cute and all, but he's not my type."

"I'm not following you."

"The reason I like you, Grimmjow, is because I like your personality. This kid's like the exact opposite of you. Why the hell would I like him?"

"Because you're stupid?"

_Ooo, nice comeback._

"I'm ignoring that for the moment. He's kind, you're...not."

"...I'm not sure if that's good or bad."

"He's a pansy when he's not fighting, you're not. His hair's orange, yours is blue..."

_You know, blue and orange are complementary colors._

_...Holy SHIT._

_That was the first thing that came to my mind. Blue and green go together too. Ulquiorra much?_

Her nose started bleeding.

"Whoa, are you okay?"

"Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm fine..."

"What happened?"

"Koutetsu's filling my mind with...rather perverted thoughts..."

"...Like what?"

"Uh. I'm not telling you."

"Why?"

"..."

_Should I be concerned for your safety, Koutetsu?_

_...Erm. I don't THINK so...I'm only in my sword form right now...What's the worst he can do?  
_

_..._

She shook her head.

"Nu-uh, still not telling you..."

"...You're really annoying."

"You're not gay are you?"

"Uh, no."

"When was the last time you checked?"

"Last time I checked...? Did you think I can just randomly turn into a gay guy?"

"You never know."

"You're twisted. If you care so much, you check."

"Ugh. Pervert."

"Why are you asking me this, anyway?"

"...Okay. Just...if you do happen to ever turn gay, go for Ichigo or Ulquiorra. You'd please a lot of girls that way."

Imagine the most what-the-fuck-are-you-talking-about-psychopath look you can. That was on Grimmjow's face.

"Look, just forget I said anything."

"That's not going to happen. Are you telling me I should go be gay and have boy-sex with emo boy or that fag kid cause we'd make girls drool over us?"

"...Well, yeah. I'm surprised you got that."

"I'm not stupid."

"Could've fooled me."

"You-"

"Yori?"

She looked down the sidewalk.

"Ah, fuck. Quick, go, hide!"

"Why?"

"Because Ichigo's coming!"

"So? Let him see me. I'll kill him."

"NO. GO HIDE NOW OR I"LL KILL YOU."

"Hmph. As if you could. And Yori? Is that some dumb name you came up with?"

"I don't want to hear it. Just go."

"But-"

"GO OR I'LL RIP OUT YOUR EYES AND PUT THAT TELEPHONE POLE THROUGH YOUR HEART."

"You couldn't do that."

"GO."

"Fine..."

"And don't complain if you see anything."

"Yeah, yeah. Hey wait! See what? What are you planning to-"

"Go away!"

She shoved Grimmjow into the alley.

"Yori? Is everything alright?"

"Ah, yeah! Everything's fine!"

"You were taking a while. Did you get lost?"

"Yes. Yes I did."

"...We did have food in my house."

"I know."

"...Then...why did you leave?"

"I dunno. Morning sickness?"

Ichigo's face turned red.

"M-Morning sickness?"

"Sure. It's morning. Isn't that a sickness you get in the morning or something?"

"When you're pregnant!"

"Oh. Well, whatever. Why are you blushing? Did you think I was pregnant?"

"Uh..."

"I'm not pregnant. Unless...unless you did something to me while I was sleeping!"

Ichigo's blush deepened.

"Of course not!"

"Oh my god you're blushing more. You DID rape me! POLICE!"

"W-What? NO! I didn't do anything!"

**!#$%^&*!#$%^&*!#$%^&*#$%^&*!#$%^&*!#$%^&*!#$%^&*!#$%^&*!**

"No, no. See officer, this is how our conversation went..."

_Nice job. They never came any of the other times you were really getting attacked. So the one time you were joking they actually came._

_Fuck off._

**!#$%^&*!#$%^&*!#$%^&*#$%^&*!#$%^&*!#$%^&*!#$%^&*!#$%^&*!**

There's chapter 11! I thank everyone who's reviewed so far!

So that means! ***Ahem***

vivvy09, NoirCiel, vivvy09 again, Something Or The Other, Wulf 4 Life, ThePlainTruth, the anon ccc, Naydra, KingofHeartless'09, Cxrahadron, Silver-Memorykeeper, and Silver-Memorykeeper again!

And, Wulf 4 Life, if you're still reading this, and anyone else who likes our wolf friend, Ookami's coming baack!~

Oh, and if you liked this story, Silver-Memorykeeper wrote one called 'Spinning Desires' which you should really check out because it rockz!


	12. Chapter 12

KK: It's 8:30 pm on a Saturday night, I had pizza for dinner, and a cup of chocolate pudding is in my grasp. All is well, and now it's better cause you get a new chapter. :) Enjoy.

**!#$%^&***

"Well. That was not fun."

Chihana and Ichigo sat in his room.

"What, the thing with the police? They understood pretty well."

"Easy for you to say. _I_ was the one being held for rape..."

"Suck it up. You're a man. I think."

"Being man has nothing to do with it."

"Sure it does. Women are more...ergh...vulnerable?"

"Out of all things you are, vulnerable is not-wait. You think?"

"Of course I think. I'm not dead, am I?"

"You said you _think_ I'm a man?"

"Oh. Well yeah. I've never actually _checked_, have I? You could be a girl."

"...Do me a favor."

"What?"

"If you ever think I'm a girl, please _don't_ check..."

"Why not?"

"Why not? Becau-ugh. Just forget it."

"Okay."

They sat in silence, until Ichigo's phone rang.

Chihana jumped.

Ichigo gave her a 'WTF?' look and answered his phone.

"Hello? Yeah? Why? Um, I can't. ...Well, I've got a guest. Are you sure? Okay, I'll be right over."

He hung up.

"So what is that?"

"What is what?"

She pointed at his phone.

"A phone. We had this conversation earlier."

"Oh yeah. So that's the 'sill phone' one."

"Cell."

"Who?"

"..._Cell_ phone. Not 'sill phone'."

"Who said it was a sill phone?"

"You did."

"I wouldn't say something so stupid." **-totally knows what she said but is too embarrassed to admit it- **

"...Right. Anyway, that was my friend, Orihime Inoue."

"That's nice."

"Me and my friends-"

"My friends and _I_."

"...Were going to go see a movie together. Orihime says you can come if you want."

"Sounds spectacular."

"You don't have to go."

"Oh. Sorry. SOUNDS SPECTACULAR I CAN'T WAIT LET'S GO NOWZ!1!"

"...No, seriously, no one's making you come-"

"I'm going. I want to meet your friends."

"Okay. Let's go then."

They got up and started heading out.

"So how many people are going?"

"Um...six."

"Plus us."

"Eight."

"Minus three."

"What? Why? Are you planning on killing three people or something?"

The thought of killing ran through her head.

Her face broke into a smile.

"Ah, nope..."

"You don't have to sound so dreamy about it..." Ichigo muttered.

"What if I started drooling?"

"That would be creepy and disgusting."

"Disgusting because of the drool, or the fact I'm drooling over killing?"

"Okay, you're seriously freaking me out here."

_Oh my Ichigo, you shouldn't have said that. Now she's never going to stop..._

"Mmm, blood. Just the thought makes me ravenous."

"Now you're doing it on purpose."

"Geheheheh...kill, kill, kill! Nehehehe!"

He hit her on the head.

She heard a growl of frustration from a passing alleyway.

_...I actually forgot Grimmjow was here._

_Ouch. How could you forget your boyfriend?_

_You've known me **how** long?_

_True enough._

Ichigo stopped.

"What...was that noise?"

She pushed him along hurriedly.

"Oh yes, Ichigo. Let's _**stop**_ in front of the alley where there's a threatening noise coming from. Better yet, why don't we go SEE what was making the noise! Yes, let's walk into a dark alley with NO weapons to see what made the DANGEROUS NOISE that likely came from something that can kill us. That's smart. No, you should fucking run _away_ from things like that. You're just as bad as stupid women in monster movies. There's this giant, evil thing that's killed a bunch of people already running right at you, but instead of running, you stand there and scream and then it rips out your heart. Great."

"Jesus, I was just curious."

"Curiosity killed the cat."

_More like being curious gets you killed by the cat._

_Wha-Oh. Ha ha. That's very funny. Don't tell Grimmjow._

_...I thought it was funny._

"I'm not a cat."

"Fine then. Curiosity killed the stupid teenage boy."

"I'm not stupid."

"I beg to differ."

"Hey Ichigo!"

A girl with long dark orange hair waved.

"Hey, Orihime."

"Is this your friend?"

"Yeah. Yori, Orihime."

"Nice to meet you."

Orihime turned to address Ichigo.

"Keigo and Mizuiro said they couldn't make it, but Chad, Tatsuki, and Ishida are coming."

"Ishida's coming?"

"Mmm-hmm! He said he had time."

"That surprises me."

"Who's Ishida?"

"He's just a stuck up guy. It surprises me he would waste his time to watch a movie."

"That's not a very nice thing to say."

"This from the girl who was talking about killing people on the way here."

"Hey, if it were up to you, we'd be dead because you would want to walk into a dark alley to see what made a noise."

_He'd be dead anyway. You know Grimmjow wouldn't kill you._

_You never know. He could be in one of his 'moods.'_

_I wasn't aware he had 'moods.'_

_Well, you're not aware of a lot of things._

_...At least I knew what a phone was._

_Shut up._

Chihana turned to Orihime.

"So, what do you like to do Orihime?"

"Me? Oh, I like to cook! But nobody ever eats anything I make."

"That's a shame! Tell you what, I'll go with you after the movie's done and you can cook for me!"

"Really? That'd be so fun! Tatsuki can come too! Then we can all go shopping!"

"Ah! That's good! I want to buy one of those cell phone things."

"Then I can give you my number!"

"Sounds like a plan!"

"Am I included in this plan?"

A girl with short spiky black hair stood behind them.

"Tatsuki! Of course you're included. This is Yori, Ichigo's guest."

"Guest?"

"Not girlfriend, if that's what you're thinking."

"Well, duh. Who'd wanna go out with Ichigo? No offense, Orihime."

Tatsuki whispered the last part.

"I heard that, Tatsuki!"

"It's good to know your ears work, then!"

Chihana laughed.

"I like you, Tatsuki."

"Hey, thanks."

"Can I get your number when we go shopping for my phone?"

"Sure, why not?"

They continued talking until Ishida and Chad showed up.

"Hello. I'm Yori."

"Hello."

"Mmm."

"Now, which one of you is Ishida?"

Ishida curiously raised his hand.

Chihana surveyed him throughly.

"Y'know Ichigo, I think you were only bashing him because he's better looking than you."

A vein popped on his forehead.

"What?"

"You were 'bashing' me, Kurosaki?"

"Yeah. He said you were stuck up and that it surprised him you would waste your time to come to a movie."

Ishida glared at Ichigo.

"I see."

"I let you stay in my house, eat my food, and you turn on me? Some friend you are!"

"You never said I couldn't tell him what you said."

And with that, she walked into the theater.

**!#$%^&*!#$%^&*!#$%^&*!#$%^&*!#$%^&*!#$%^&*!#$%^&*!#$%^&***

"Never again."

"Never again what Tatsuki what's wrong?"

"Never again will I allow either of you to eat more than one box of Spree."

"AWWW but they were so nice and tasty."

"Yeah, Tatsuki-chan! Why can't we have more?"

Chihana and Orihime were currently bouncing up and down as they walked out of the movie theater.

"Why? Because both of you are so insane right now. TOO. MUCH. SUGAR."

Ichigo had went back to his house, and Chad and Ishida had went on their way as well.

"Shopping will burn off the sugar don't you think so Orihime?"

"Yes yes! Let's go Tatsuki-chan let's gooo!"

Tatsuki stopped walking.

"If you to don't start to control yourselves, we are _not_ going shopping."

Chihana and Orihime stopped bouncing immediately.

"Sorry, Tatsuki."

"Yeah. Now let's go so we can buy Yori a phone and then I can cook for her!"

Tatsuki sighed and allowed them to drag her to the mall.

Chihana bought a bunch of new clothes that Orihime washed for her, not to mention a bright orange phone, one that flips up for talking and sideways for texting.

The girls exchanged numbers, and then Orihime and Tatsuki spent the first hour in Orihime's house teaching Chihana how to use the phone.

They spent the next hour teaching her abbreviations for texting.

And then...

"Who wants dinner?"

Chihana raised her hands, and Tatsuki looked at Chihana with sympathy knowing the girl was going to have to eat Orihime's cooking no matter what now.

**!#$%^&*!#$%^&*!#$%^&*!#$%^&*!#$%^&*!#$%^&*!#$%^&*!#$%^&***

Chihana looked down at her plate with interest.

"This looks..."

Orihime frowned.

"It's okay if you don't want to eat it."

"What's in it?"

"Um...Well, I put in-"

Chihana cut her off.

"No, never mind. I'm just gonna wing it, I'm not allergic to anything."

The substance on the plate looked like curry, but it was...bright purple.

It also had many chunks of vegetables (she assumed they were vegetables) that for the life of her, Chihana could not name.

"It's an interesting color."

She picked up her utensils, and poked it with a fork.

It changed color from purple to turquoise.

"EPIC! Color changing! That's new to me."

Before she had time to think about it, she scooped it up and put it in her mouth.

She chewed, and swallowed tentatively.

Tatsuki and Orihime stared at her.

She flung her hands to her throat and started coughing.

"Yori? Are you okay?"

She sat up quickly.

"PSYCH! I was just messin'. It actually tastes pretty good."

Orihime cheered, and Tatsuki gagged.

"It tastes good? But..it changed color for God's sake!"

She ate another bite, and Tatsuki just shook her head.

"Unbelievable."

Soon after, they discovered the 'curry' could be shaped and used as bouncy-balls.

Firs they had fun just bouncing them up and down, until Chihana hit Tatsuki in the face with one, and thus the war began.

Each girl retreated to a corner of the room and made a fort with things from Orihime's room (mostly pillows), and started throwing curry balls at each other.

Orihime was declared the winner of The Battle of the Curry, with Chihana in second, and Tatsuki in third.

Tatsuki was not happy with being in third, because the only reason she lost was because the first ball Chihana had hit her in the face with had burned her eyes so her vision was blurry.

So Chihana let Tatsuki take second, mostly because Tatsuki had a bat (that came out of nowhere) and it was best not to make her angry.

After Orihime's victory party, they suddenly realized Orihime's room was a mess of curry and...was that blood? The girls exchanged nervous looks, and looked themselves over for injuries.

They spent the rest of the night cleaning up, Chihana showered and changed her clothes (not wanting to do it at the Kurosaki's) and then she took her new clothes and phone and headed back to Ichigo's house.

**!#$%^&*!#$%^&*!#$%^&*!#$%^&*!#$%^&*!#$%^&*!#$%^&*!#$%^&***

As she walked up to the front door, it occurred to her she could've asked to stay with Orihime.

It also occurred to her how late it was, and being the kind caring person she was, she decided not to ring the doorbell but instead climb in through Ichigo's open window.

She walked around to Ichigo's window.

"This should be easy enough. It's not too high."

She started climbing, but about halfway up, she lost her footing and fell, landing on the ground with a quiet 'ow'.

"Well, _that_ was graceful."

She looked over to see Grimmjow sitting on the ground watching her.

"You could've helped."

"Why on Earth would I help you get into some horny teenager's room?"

"Horny?"

"Aren't all teenage boys who have hot girls staying with they horny? I know I was."

"Aw, you think I'm hot. And he hasn't shown any signs of...horniness I guess, unless provoked."

"Give him a year. Then the sight of any girl will get him thinking perverted. Or guys, I don't know his particular preference...Wait. Whaddya mean 'provoked'?"

"Oh nothing."

She started climbing.

He grabbed the back of her shirt and pulled her down.

"That wasn't very nice." she huffed.

"You know what else isn't nice? Ignoring your boyfriend and making him pissed."

He pressed his lips to hers.

_Bow-chika-bow-wow._

_Wow, I actually had forgotten you'd existed there for a while. You've been strangely silent._

_I'm not into sleepovers and shopping. They're not exactly guy things._

_GUY THINGS! YOU ARE A MALE, I KNEW IT!_

_Oops. I wanted to keep that secret._

Grimmjow noticed her distraction and sighed when he broke their kiss.

"Yes! You know what Grimmjow?"

"...No."

"Koutetsu's a GUY! I knew it, I knew it, I kneeeewwww ittt!"

She did a small happy dance while Grimmjow watched her with annoyance.

"It's amazing..."

She stopped dancing.

"What's amazing?"

"Your stupidity."

"Ehhhh? But...but I was _right_! Why am I stupid?"

Grimmjow groaned and pinched the bridge of his nose.

"Did you even _notice _I was kissing you...?"

She paused.

"Oops. Uh, sorry. Kind of got caught up in the moment."

The wrong moment, Grimmjow thought.

"I should just stop trying to be romantic altogether. It's too subtle for you."

He looked up at her and she grinned sheepishly.

"I doubt you'd even notice if I threw you on a bed and started having sex with you."

"I think I'd notice that."

"Wanna bet?"

"Ye-...No."

"That's what I thought."

"Look, I'm sorry. It was Koutetsu's fault. He always starts talking when we're doing anything."

"Why the hell does he do that?" Grimmjow growled.

"I don't know. I'll ask him. Koutetsu?"

_Yesh?_

"You heard."

_...I don't think he's right for you._

Her jaw dropped.

"You've got to be FUCKING KIDDING ME."

"What?"

She held her hand up to silence him.

"Not RIGHT FOR ME?"

_That's what I said._

"You're the one prancing around singing about sex and everything else encouraging me to get with him and NOW YOU THINK HE'S NOT RIGHT FOR ME?"

_Well. I never actually thought he'd follow through. _

She facepalmed.

"Seriously, what the FUCK."

_Look, tell him to wait until we get back to Hueco Mundo. I'll have a quality chat with him._

"What? How are you gonna do that?"

_Just tell him._

She looked at Grimmjow, who was throughly pissed now if he wasn't before.

"Yes..?"

"Uh. Koutetsu says he thinks you're not right for me."

"Caught that."

"And he says to wait until we get back to Hueco Mundo and he'll have a quality chat with you."

He raised an eyebrow.

"How the hell's he gonna do THAT?"

She shrugged.

"He wouldn't say."

"And speaking of getting back to Hueco Mundo, we're leaving tomorrow."

"What? How? I can't just up and disappear."

"I'll come and pick you up."

"Uh. Okay?"

He kissed her forehead.

"Just go climb the side of the house and get to sleep. Don't let that Soul Reaper touch you or anything."

He turned and started walking.

"Um, can you help me up?"

"No."

She pouted. Then grinned.

"Oh, Ichigooo...I just _love_ the way he holds me when we sleep...He's _sooo _dreamy...I bet _he_ would help me up the side of a house..." she sighed.

Grimmjow turned his head back to glare at her, then sighed and walked back to help her up.

"Thanks."

"Yeah, yeah. You're a bitch, y'know."

"Ah, but I'm your bitch."

"True 'nuff."

He smacked her ass as she pulled herself up the window.

She yelped, getting a chuckle out of Grimmjow.

When she looked back down to glare at him, he was already gone.

She climbed in the window, threw her bags in a corner and 'accidentally' landed on a sleeping Ichigo.

"Yaaaa!"

"Hey, be quiet, you're gonna wake everybody up."

"Why are you HERE?"

"...Because I'm staying here?"

"But, you, ergh! Sleep on the floor!"

He shoved her off the bed.

She huffed and curled up in ball.

"...Men!" she whispered before falling to sleep.

**!#$%^&*!#$%^&*!#$%^&*!#$%^&*!#$%^&*!#$%^&*!#$%^&*!#$%^&***

I'd like to thank ultima-owner for reviewing 11 times! That's a record. If you like poems, the dude's got some awesome poems about Bleach and Pokemon. I'll admit I like Pokemon...The games anyway. -_- Also thanks to Silver-Memorykeeper and xXSweetestXAngelXNightmareXx. I hope you liked chapter 12! Chapter 13 should be coming out shortly as well! (I'm on a roll!) I hope the new page breaks are working out okay...

Oh and also, I'm going through some posting delays, so by the time you get this chapter, the next should already be typed. But my brother's been using 'our' laptop too much lately so I haven't been able to post anything until he's in the shower or somewhere else. :( He goes to college in 12 days (or however many it is when I post this) so then I'll get his laptop all for myself. And the chapters should come faster because school's starting up in 11 days, and I get most of my time to write in school. Which sounds weird to you, but I'm only going into eighth grade, so yeah. The hardest class I'm gonna have is either Algebra 1 or Spanish 1. The rest are like free time/nap time/writing time. I'm currently working on a drawing of Koutetsu that'll I'll post somewhere, deviantART probably. But you don't get the link until he makes his grand appearance! It'll be good. I hope. I talk to much.

Reviews are welcome!


	13. Chapter 13

For chapters 1-8, 11, 12, and this one, 13, I PRESENT_*DRUM ROLL*

DISCLAIMER: I DON'T OWN BLEACH! Big surprise.

**!#$%^&***

"GOOD MORNING, ICHIGOOOOO!"

Ichigo's dad came flying through the door to attack his sleeping son.

Ichigo flipped him onto the floor.

"Crazy old man..."

"VERY GOOD, MY BELOVED SON!"

Isshin spotted Chihana on the floor.

"Ichigo! How could let our beautiful guest sleep on the floor?"

"She came in late. I was already in my bed."

Chihana stirred.

"Ah, good morning Mr. Kurosaki. And Ichigo."

"Good morning, Yori! My lovely daughter Yuzu has already started breakfast downstairs if you're hungry! I am so sorry our horrible son made you sleep on the floor."

"It was no big deal. Don't worry about it."

After Isshin attack Ichigo some more, he finally left.

"Yo, get up off my floor."

Chihana blinked her eyes at an annoyed Ichigo standing over her.

She held her arms up to him.

"Carry me."

"No. Get up."

She grumbled.

"I can't wait for breakfast. I'm starving after eating at Orihime's."

Ichigo's eyes widened.

"You _ate_ at _**Orihime's**_?"

"Yeah. Then we had a curry fight."

He stared blankly at her.

"I don't even wanna know..."

"That's probably for the best."

**!#$%^&***(KK:Hey, just using one saves me a lot of trouble. I'm so stupid. -_- *sweatdrop*)

After changing and getting dressed, Chihana went downstairs with Ichigo to eat breakfast.

"Yuzu, whenever I get around to leaving can I take you with me to cook?"

"Sorry Yori, but I think I'm needed here."

"Darn. Your cooking's amazing. It feels like it's been forever since I had good food."

"You did eat at Orihime's last night." Ichigo said.

"...I would deny you, but I think you may be right for once."

Ichigo was about to make a snarky comeback, but then doorbell interrupted them.

"Who could that be?"

"Oh wait, gimme a minute to use my magical x-ray powers to look through the door."

She put her hands to her temples and closed her eyes. Ichigo rolled his eyes.

"Hmm. Maybe it's one of my cousins come to pick me up."

"If you're right, I'll eat Orihime's food."

"Deal. And if I'm not right?"

"Um, how about-"

The doorbell rang again, three quick times in a row.

"Sounds annoyed. You better get it before the dude kicks your door down."

Ichigo scowled and got up to answer the door.

"Hellooo...Whoa."

Chihana quickly abandoned her breakfast to see who was at the door.

The girl was wearing high-heeled sandals, a super short look-at-my-ass pink skirt, a light green tank top her way-too-large-to-be-humanly-possible breasts were spilling out of. She was carrying a tan handbag, had long, wavy blond hair and...

...Unmistakable bright blue eyes. The annoyed expression on 'her' face was unmistakable as well.

"Um, I'm Gr-...ace. I'm here to pick up my cousin..."

"Yori?"

"Uh, yeah. That's her." 'Grace' pointed to Yori.

_Oh. My. GOD._

Chihana burst out laughing.

'Grace' blushed a little, and Ichigo looked at her like she was crazy.

"Uh, Yori, why are you laughing?"

Chihana tried to catch her breath.

"Well...you see...the last time I knew Grace, she was a Gregory." she said solemnly.

"Uh...okay. Go get your stuff."

She ran upstairs and looked back to see Ichigo glancing at 'Grace' with a raised eyebrow.

The last thing she heard was, "What the hell are you starin' at, _boy_?"

Chihana quickly gathered up her bags of clothes and phone.

_That was NOT Grimmjow._

"It WAS. I don't believe it WAS."

_Oh my god, that is soo awkward._

"I'm gonna make fun of him forever now."

_...I'm speechless for once._

"There's a first for everything. Speechlessness, cross dressing..."

_BWAHAHAHA!_

She tuned out Koutetsu's laughing and hurried back downstairs.

"Sorry to make you wait, _Grace_."

'Grace' was not amused.

Chihana turned to Ichigo.

"Thanks for letting me stay here. You'll say goodbye to Orihime and everybody for me, won't you?"

"Yeah, sure. Stay in touch."

"Hurry it up, _Yori_." 'Grace' said.

Chihana looked at 'Grace'.

Then she turned back to Ichigo.

_Oh no. I know what you're thinking. Don't do it, he'll kill you-_

She kissed Ichigo on the lips.

Ichigo blushed darkly, and Yuzu giggled.

'Grace's' eye twitched, obviously trying not to take out the wall next to her, or Ichigo, for that matter.

Chihana stopped kissing him and walked out the door next to 'Grace.'

"I'll call you later, Ichigo."

"Neh, y-yeah...bye."

He waved feebly as she closed the door.

"What. The. FUCK WAS THAT?"

"It's nice to meet you Grace. I'm Chihana."

"Screw you, you know it's me! Why the fuck did you do that?"

"To make you angry. You're so cute when you're jealous, it makes me want to hug you."

Grimmjow hissed.

"And what's with the...outfit? Is this some new thing you developed when I was away?"

"No you IDIOT, it was a fucking disguise to get you, and fucking Szayel and Nnoitra thought it would be fucking funny if they made me a fucking _girl_."

"We can be sisters now!"

"No."

"Aw, but we could go shopping!"

"NO."

"But-"

"NO. NEVER IN A MILLION YEARS WOULD I STAY IN THIS THING."

"Even for me?"

"God, no. And it looks like you already went shopping."

He looked down at her bags.

"Oh yeah, Orihime, Tatsuki and I went shopping."

"So what, you're friends with them now?"

"Yep."

He frowned.

"And what happens when you have to fight them?"

"...I shout 'SURPRISE!' and fight them."

"Seriously."

"Sure, why not. I'll let it play out."

He sighed.

"So what'd you buy?"

"Why do you care?"

"Just curious."

"Clothes. Oh, and twelve cans of spray paint."

"...Spray paint?"

"My new room is _not_ going to be white when I'm done with it. I got black, brown, gray, pink, violet, blue, sky blue, red, green, yellow, orange, and white. Even though the wall's white..."

"What's the difference between sky blue and blue? Blue's blue."

"You are SO wrong! blue is like the ocean, and sky blue is lighter, like the sky. Then there's blue-green, which is like weird grass or something. And your hair! Your hair's electric blue. Well, it isn't now cause you're blond now, but before."

"I thought electricity was normally represented by yellow..."

"You can use big words!"

He scowled.

"I'm not as stupid as you."

"And electricity can be represented by a lot of colors...I guess. Why do you have to make things so hard all the time?"

He rolled his eyes and opened a Garganta.

"...You need to teach me how to open these scary monster mouth things. That would have prevented this whole situation."

"Wow, you actually have a good idea for once. Congratulations."

He blocked her attempt to punch him in the face.

**!#$%^&***

That was too short...Sorry. I'll post chapter 14 soon to make up for it.

Same as usual, reduce, reuse, recycle, and review PWEASE :3


	14. Chapter 14

I have no excuses. To be completely honest, I forgot this story existed until I recently got a couple reviews and was like '...Oh snap. I have a story.' My email inbox also has 264 messages, so it was kind of hard finding everything...But on the bright side, we're learning better writing methods in Language Arts class, so this might improve or something...oh God I'm sorry I have such guilt. Here you go...

And a warning, there's a lot of OOC-ness in here.

**!#$%^&***

Chihana glanced lazily around her room. Bland and white. Everything was always white. There was nothing good about white.

Spray paint, however, was fabulous. She went to work immediately with the paint, making her room rainbow-fied. She laughed. A sarcastic exhale sounded behind her. She turned around quickly and tripped over a black object that suddenly appeared behind her. "OH SHIT!"

She hit her head hard on the floor. "What was that for?"

A black wolf sat staring at her with a smile on his face. "I have not done anything to you. You simply turned around and your own two feet stumbled over me and you preceded to fall to the ground and inflict pain onto yourself."

"...There was no need for that arrogant sentence."

"I was not aware a sentence could be arrogant."

"Uh-huh. You use your big words and sound all fancy and think your better than me cause of it."

"You used the wrong form of 'your'. You should have used the conjunction 'you're', meaning 'you are'."

"Fine then, be a Mr. Smartypants, I don't care."

"I do not wear pants. I have in fact never worn pants."

"Will you just shut-wait, how could tell what form of 'your' I used in the first place?"

"So you are wondering why I am here, yes?"

"Well. Yeah. Just to trip me?"

"It was not my intention to throw off your counterbalance."

"I'm just going to pretend you didn't say that."

"Ah, la mujer, que ser grosero para mí. Incluso pensé que no han hecho nada."

"...Ergh. Sí?"

"私は彼女のために少し同情を感じている。彼女は、私が言うことを知らない、まだ彼女が応答する彼女のベストを試みます。人間は、このような愚かな生き物です。 "

"...Okay, I don't even know how to friggen read that. That's like...so cheating."

"Elle a également été trop pris dans notre conversation qu'elle n'a pas remarqué la taille plutôt grande, l'homme du lot portant des yeux qui est apparu à la porte. Chihana, Nnoitra est derrière vous."

She paused. "Okay. I heard my name, and..."

"Mine."

She whipped around quickly, and almost ran into Nnoitra.

"Why is everyone I hate suddenly in one room? And why do I have to be in it?"

"That hurts my feelings. And what the fuck did you do to your room?"

"I painted it. Duh."

Chihana looked down quickly at Ookami.

"So why are you here? In English, please."

"Well. I really do not feel like telling you. I would tell you if you could catch me, but that is highly unlikely."

She glared. Then looked up at Nnoitra, who was looking at Ookami in puzzlement. She forgot that only Grimmjow and Zasen had met Ookami.

"Hey Nnoitra."

"What?"

"Can you catch Ookami for me? Pleeaseee?"

"Don't beg. It's disgusting. Especially from you. And why can't you do it?"

"Because I'm a weakling, and you're so much stronger, and faster, and more skilled, and-"

"You are such a suck up. That sounded so fake."

She pouted. "But seriously. Do it. Now."

He rolled his eyes. "That's what she said. And no."

"But I wanna know why he's heeerrrreee!"

"Then. Catch. Him. Yourself. Don't whine like a brat."

"No. YOU. DO IT. NOW. BEFORE I HIT YOU IN THE FACE."

"Go ahead and try."

She raised her hand, and quickly put it down again. Broken bones weren't her thing.

She sighed. "Please, Nnoitra?"

He looked at her thoughtfully for a moment. Then he sighed. "Welllll...no."

She huffed. "You son of a bitch. Go get him, now."

"No."

"You just won't because you can't."

His eyes narrowed. "Wanna bet?"

She actually just wanted to see him run around trying to catch Mr. InvincaWolf, and then she wanted to laugh at him. No one could catch Ookami. He was like, epic. "Yeah. I wanna bet."

He grinned. Then he walked up to Ookami, who had surprisingly sat there silently the whole time. Then he picked him up. With no trouble. He jaw dropped.

"I caught your wolf. You must suck really bad to not be able to do that."

"What the ffff-Ookami! Eh?"

"To be honest, Chihana my dear, I wanted to see you lose the bet to make your life miserable. And I'm not telling you why I'm here because technically _you_ did not catch me. Good day."

And he disappeared. Chihana looked at Nnoitra.

"Uh. I don't take bets."

He grinned. "Too late."

Suddenly, Chihana realized something. She hadn't heard a word from Koutetsu. Glancing down at her side, she could see her sword was still there. But his voice had gone. Maybe he had laryngitis or something.

**!#$%^&***

Grimmjow was angry at Szayel and Nnoitra.

Putting him in a female gigai. Bastards.

A good disguise, Szayel had said.

He was gonna kill the fucker the next time he got a chance.

His day proceeded to go downhill wen he found a person in his room.

His hand flew to Pantera.

"Who the fuck are you?"

"Calm down, Grimmy-chan. I'm not going to hurt you or anything."

"Who. The. Fuck. Are. You?"

The kid frowned.

"I am Koutetsu! I told you I'd be having a chat with you."

Grimmjow raised an eyebrow and looked him over.

Orange hair with green highlights fell out from a purple bandanna wrapped around his head. He was wearing a red t-shirt A red strip of cloth was tied around the left leg or his blue jeans, which fell over brown boots of some sort.

"...I thought Chihana said you were male."

A vein popped on his forehead.

"I _am_. How rude."

"You don't look like a dude. All you're missing are breasts."

"And I don't have them, so that makes me MALE."

"How are you even here? I didn't think swords could just materialize on their own."

"Silly little boy. It's because I...am awesome."

"That doesn't make any sense."

"Shut up. I am here to ask you questions to see if you are good enough for _my_ precious Chihana to date."

"I already had sex with her. You're kind of late."

"What can I say? I'm a procrastinator. First question: Is that your natural hair color?"

"What does this have to do with anything?"

"ANSWER THE QUESTION."

"...Yes."

"Question two!~ Are you bisexual?"

"What? No!"

Koutetsu frowned.

"Three. Have you ever taken an interest in men?"

"What the fuck. No."

"Never?"

"Never."

"Never EVER?"

"Jesus, NO!"

Koutetsu's frown deepened.

"Fine. Four. Is that eye shadow, a tattoo, or what?"

Grimmjow sighed. This was not his day.

**!#$%^&***

"No bets."

"You already made it."

"No. I'm going to deny everything you say."

"You made the bet."

"What are you talking about."

"The bet. That you made."

"No idea what you're saying."

"You owe me."

"No clue. I don't even know who you are."

"Bet."

"Hello."

"You made it."

"I don't believe we've met."

"I think this will make you go crazy before me."

"Lovely weather today."

"It's the same weather we have every day of the year."

"And it's lovely, isn't it."

"I suppose."

"Yes."

"Certainly."

"Do you come here often?"

"I live here."

"That's nice."

"It is nice."

Chihana's eye twitched.

"You're breaking."

"I am not."

"You are too. Your eye twitched."

"Did not."

"Did too."

"It's a nervous disorder."

"Oh my. How terrible. My grandmother once had a nervous disorder."

"No she didn't."

"How rude."

"You don't have a grandmother."

"How would you know?"

"Am I wrong?"

"No."

"See. Like I said."

"So."

"So...What do people in China call their good plates?"

"Why would I know?"

"No. It's a joke. Get it?"

"Apparently not."

"How can you not get that?"

"I just don't. What does China have to do with it?"

"China is what people call good plates. Like fine China."

"Why the fuck would they do that? That's like...saying they own the country in plate form or something."

"...I never really thought about it."

"Obviously. I don't even know why you would bring that up in the first place since it has no purpose in our conversation."

"Well. It was just something to say."

"Which means you're running out of things to say."

"Uh..."

"Which means I'm winning."

"..."

"So."

"So."

"Bet."

"No. It's not happening."

"Bet."

"I'm sorry I must be going deaf. What did you say?"

"You must be going stupid too."

"What? Deaf, remember?"

Nnoitra sighed.

"I give up. You're useless."

"Yes! I win!"

"Ha. I knew you weren't deaf."

"Do you exist just to annoy the hell outta me?"

"That and everyone else."

"Good job then."

"Thank you. I take my work very seriously."

"I noticed. And this is getting tedious. I do give up this time. What do you want?"

"What do I want? Huh. I actually didn't think about it."

"You...didn't...think...about...IT?"

"Nope."

"AFTER ALL OF THAT?"

"Yeah. And you're too stupid for a sex slave or anything useful so..."

"I'M GONNA KILL YOU."

"You wish you could kill me. What should I make you do...?"

"Well, I know I should take your sword and shove it up your-"

_~ All eyes on me in the center of the ring just like a circus  
When I crack that whip, everybody gon' trip just like a circus  
Don't stand there watching me, follow me, show me what you can do  
Everybody let go, we can make a dancefloor just like a circus ~_

"What the fuck is _that_?"

"Oh yeah. I forgot I bought a cellphone in the human world. How do we have bars here?"

"What?"

Chihana dug here phone out of the bag of things she got from the human world.

"Hello?"

"Are there people in that thing? Who're you talking to?"

"Hey, Orihime! How've you been?"

"Who?"

"Gee, that sounds like fun, but I'm kinda busy now."

"Fun? A bitch like you is capable of _**fun**_?"

Chihana glared.

"When am I free next? Oh, I don't know. I'm sorta full for...the next few centuries y'kno...I know, I know, it's ridiculous, but we live in different worlds. How so? Uh..."

"You're dead and she's a human?"

"SHUT UP NNOITRA YOU ARE SERIOUSLY RUINING MY CONVERSATION HERE! Huh? Oh, uh, Nnoitra? He's my...uh..."

"Boyfriend?"

"Hell no. My...dog. Oh yeah, he's nice and...cuddly? Sure."

"Dog? What the fuck? How am I cuddly? I am not a dog."

"Hey, I'll call you later Orihime. I got work to do. Um, I'm a...citrus fruit dyer. Yep, real interesting. Bye."

"...Citrus fruit dyer?"

"Yeah, those people that dye citrus to make it look...brighter or something."

"And you chose that...?"

"Because that's the only thing I could think of! I'm not good under pressure!"

"...Okay."

"Why were you in my room in the first place anyway?"

"Me...? ...Oh yeah, Aizen called a meeting."

"When?"

"Like forty minutes ago when I first came here."

"So basically we're like forty minutes late to an important meeting."

"Er, yeah, I guess so."

"Uh. So we either go to the meeting and have Zasen get mad at us for being late, or we don't go at all and have him get mad at us for not going."

"Well. I ain't going to some meeting if it's already halfway over."

"And I'm not staying here with you. Goodbye."

"Have fun."

"Hardy har har."

**!#$%^&***

Chihana approached the meeting room with caution. She considered bailing, but she didn't really have anywhere else to go. When she walked in the doors, she noticed that she was the only one there besides Zasen, Gin, Tousen, and Szayel.

"Um, am I late...?"

"Well. Nobody else came, so I guess not. Nobody here like, even cares about me anymore!"

"Uh, you okay, Zas-er, Aizen-sama?"

"No! I am NOT okay! I hate it here! I hate my life! I just wanna die!"

He started sobbing. Chihana slowly starting backing out the door.

"Yea, it would probably be best if ya left, Chihana. I think Aizen here's finally havin 'is annual emotional breakdown." Gin said calmly. Tousen nodded.

"Uh. Then why did he call a meeti-"

"I CALLED A MEETING BECAUSE I FELT LIKE IT! DO YOU HAVE A PROBLEM WITH THAT? DO YOU? MAYBE I JUST WANTED SOME COMPANY! DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS TO KEEP UP THIS WHOLE RULER OF THE WORLD FACE? It's actually really lonely, to tell you the truth. Makes me feel like crying. And dancing. At the same time. Is that normal, Szayel?

"No...I wish you would schedule these things of yours in advance so I could make your proper medicine a day ahead of time..."

"I'm so sorry! I'm so worthless! I want die! And dance? I kind of want to take a nap too. Am I dreaming? I had a wonderful dream once about about ruling the world. Did I ever tell you, Gin? It was wonderful."

"Ya, you said..."

"Absolutely wonderful. Did I ever tell you I had a dream once that was wonderful?"

"The one 'bout rulin da world?"

"Yes yes. That one. It was so wonderful."

"'m sure it was."

"I like dreams. Dreams are wonderful. Except nightmares. I had a nightmare once. I was blind. It was awful. Can you imagine being blind, Tousen?"

"...I am blind."

"YOU ARE? Oh my, that must be awful. Awful awful awful. Why didn't I know that? I should know these things about my closest friends. You are my friends, right?"

"Yes, Aizen-sama..."

"It's so wonderful to have friends. You know what else is wonderful?"

"Dreams?"

"How did you know?"

"You've mentioned it once or twice."

"Oh."

Chihana stood in the back of the room listening. This was quite entertaining to her. Szayel walked over to her with a test tube in his hand.

"I suppose you're wondering what's going on here."

"I'm more wishing I had a camera."

"Aizen gets like this at least once a year. I make a medicine for him that helps it, but it takes a few hours for the chemicals to mix."

"Can't you like, use a spoon?"

"No. They just have to settle. Unfortunately I can't make it too far in advance or it doesn't work. The most it lasts is a day. I think the best remedy for him would just be to shove a sword through his brain."

"We can only hope."

"I suppose..."

"Hey Gin?"

"Ya, Aizen-sama?"

"Have I ever told you I also once had a desire to become a butterfly? I had a dream about that too. It was wonderful. Flying through the air, killing everyone below me with lazer that shot out of my eyes, ahh. It was wonderful."

"Uh...Yes, Aizen-sama."

"You're wonderful too Gin. I love you."

"..."

"Can two men have children if they tried hard enough?"

"Szayel? Is that med'cine ready for 'im yet?"

"No Gin, I'm afraid you'll have to bear with this."

Gin grimaced. Chihana smiled.

"As much as I'd love to stay and watch this, I think I'm gonna just leave now..."

"Smart choice, Chihana...Run while you can. Last time we had to play musical chairs."

Chihana bolted out the door. She decided she'd had enough excitement for today.

**!#$%^&***

I have to admit, I had fun writing this. Thanks if you're still reading this after so long...

I hope in the next chapter I might actually get some plot in this story. Wish me luck!

Britney Spears - Circus


	15. Chapter 15

Dun dun dun. It's the return of the incredibly-late-updating-author.

Oh and this argument might get confusing so it'll be like this for the first section.

_Italic - Koutetsu_

**Bold - Grimmjow**

Normal - Chihana

More OOCness in this chapter as well.

**!#$%^&***

Chihana walked back to her room. She was amused by the breakdown Aizen was having, but she was also worried about Koutetsu. She hadn't heard from him in a while, which was kind of nice though unnatural.

**"CHIHANA!"**

She quickly turned around, only to see Grimmjow storming down the hallway towards her looking angry, with an odd person following him.

"Um, what's up?"

**"What the fuck do you mean _what's up_? Get this thing away from me!"**

"You mean the freaky-lookin dude?"

**"Who else would I mean?"**

"...I don't know him. Go find someone else to take care of your gay stalker."

**"HOW CAN YOU NOT KNOW HIM? He said he's YOUR fucking sword!"**

"Uh. He did? Well, that would explain why Koutetsu's been gone all day..."

_"Hi ChiChi! I just wanted to ask Grimmjow some questions!"_

"Hi Koutetsu..."

**"Apparently your sword has some doubt about my sexuality..."**

She stifled a laugh.

**"This is NOT funny."**

"I think it's kind of funny...what'd he ask you?"

**"If I was gay. Repeatedly."**

_"I'm sorry Grimmy but I just had to make sure you were right for my ChiChi."_

**"_Your_ ChiChi? Fuck off buddy, she's mine last time I checked."**

_"No, she's mine."_

**"Is not."**

_"Is too."_

**"Is not!"**

_"Is tooooo~"_

**"IS NOT."**

_"Yes she is~"_

"Uh guys this is really awkward for me can we have this convo later out of my earshot plea-"

**"Shut up. This doesn't concern you!"**

"...Yeah it does genius you're arguing about me which automatically concerns-"

**"I said shut up!"**

"QUIT CUTTING ME OFF."

**"YOU QUIT INTERRUPTING."**

"Bastard, I can interrupt all I want! I'M INVOLVED!"

**"NO YOU'RE NOT BITCH!"**

"YOU FUCKER!"

**"YOU WHORE!"**

"HOW DARE YOU!"

_"How did I get left out of this conversation? =( "_

***BEEP* Hi guys! I'm your delightful ruler and king! I just wanted to let you all know that I love you sooo much!~ Plus all Espada need to report to the meeting room for a meeting! Haha! Luv ya guyz!~~~*BEEP***

"..."

**"...What the fuck?"**

"Annual breakdown."

**"Oh God, not again..."**

"How bad have the other ones been?"

**"Not as bad as this, I can already tell you that."**

"Great..."

Chihana and Grimmjow walked to the meeting room together in fear.

**!#$%^&***

Aizen, Gin, Tousen, and Szayel were already in the room. Chihana and Grimmjow were the last to arrive, and all the other Espada were currently doing the same activity. Staring.

"Ah, hi you guys! You're the last ones! Nice to have you!~"

Chihana and Grimmjow didn't even make it to their seats. They stood in the doorway. Aizen had a long dress on with an apron. Gin was wearing a suit. Tousen was in teenage girl apparel, and Szayel had animal ears coming out of his head. Szayel gave Chihana a strained look.

"Um...Nice to be here...Zasen..."

"You may call me Mommy Aizen."

"Uh. Okay..."

"This is my working husband. He sits in his office alllll dayyy working to put bread on the table for our family." Aizen clung to Gin's arm with a loving expression on his face. Gin was frozen.

"This is my daughter. Isn't she so cute? I just love her to death!~" Tousen had no expression, like always.

"And this is our dog. I think he ate something bad though. His fur has turned pink." Szayel's eye twitched.

Chihana looked at Grimmjow. He bent over and whispered into her ear.

"I'm ready to run for it. You coming?"

"...I'm too scared to move."

Chihana looked around at everyone else. They all seemed rather frightened as well, except Nnoitra who appeared to be having fun with the situation.

"Hey Tousen! Wanna hear a joke about your 'mom'?" Nnoitra yelled.

Tousen didn't respond, but Aizen glared at Nnoitra.

"Young man, I wouldn't appreciate you making jokes about me."

"Whaddya gonna do about it, bitch?"

"Oh you did _not._"

"Oh I DID."

"This is stupid."

"Yo momma is stupid!"

"What was that?"

"I said, Yo momma so stupid, she tried to alphabetize M&M's!"

"Oh yeah? Well Yo momma so dumb, she went to the dentist to get a bluetooth!"

"Yo momma so fat she put on a red dress and everyone was like 'HEY KOOL-AID!'"

"Yo momma so fat she sat on a rainbow and Skittles popped out!"

"Did you think that Yo momma joke was good? Well it wasn't nearly as good as yo momma was last night!"

"You did NOT just go there! C'mere I wanna kill you!"

"I'd like to see you try, Momma Aizen!"

Aizen made a lunge for Nnoitra, who ran out the door. Aizen followed him, leaving the rest of the people in the meeting room.

"So what the fuck?" Chihana asked.

Szayel sighed. "His medicine isn't working. I'm afraid he might be stuck like this for a while."

"Well I figured that. I meant with the whole..."

"He wanted...to play house..."

"...And you agreed"

"Right now he's as emotionally unstable as a pre-schooler. Plus the fact that he can in fact kill us all if he wanted to. What were we supposed to do?"

"Hire a babysitter?"

"That wouldn't be good. I'm the only one that knows how to correctly bottle feed him at the moment."

"..."

"Don't ask. It would be better if you didn't."

"Can do..."

"I CAN'T TAKE THIS ANYMORE!" Gin screamed suddenly.

"Gin, calm down..."

"No Szayel, I will NOT calm down! Do you know what its like to deal with this PSYCHO every day? He's constantly making passes at me, even when he IS sane! I'M A GUY! AND THE HUSBAND IN HIS IMAGINARY WORLD! WHY? DO YOU KNOW HOW WRONG THAT IS? **DO YOU?** It's sick! And what the fuck? How did he even get that god-damned syringe?" He started crying.

The people that were slowly recovering were now shocked back into silence. Gin was in a ball on the floor crying his eyes out. Szayel was looking at him with a stare of pity and depression.

"Oh great. Now Gin's having a breakdown as well...If any of you can still move, I suggest you leave and don't return unless _**I**_ make an announcement to..."

Everyone got up and left very quickly, except for Chihana, Grimmjow and Ulquiorra.

"We should've ran.." Grimmjow sighed.

"Eh. It's only going to get worse, I guess."

"Fantastic."

At that moment, Aizen ran back into the room.

"You! Get out of here! I don't want to see your face!"

"...Me?" Chihana asked.

"Yes you. I don't want to associate with people who are prettier than me. So you and Ulquiorra need to leave. Now."

"The fuck? Just cause you go insane doesn't give you the right to kick her outta the fuckin place."

"I CAN DO WHATEVER I WANT."

"Wanna bet, fucking cross-dressin old man?"

"Don't you take that tone with me mister. Go sit in the corner."

"...The corner?"

"Yes. I'd appreciate it if you'd go sooner than later."

"Sir Aizen, I do not think it's appropriate to ask your underling to sit in a corner." Ulquiorra muttered.

"Who cares? You shouldn't even be here, I told you and pretty face over here to leave like ages agooo!"

"Hey, I'll leave, I enjoy being called pretty." Chihana remarked.

She strutted out of the room with Ulquiorra slowly following, leaving a bewildered Grimmjow behind.

"NOW. You can go to the corner."

"I don't really want to go to the corner, so I'm not."

"Fine. I CHOOSE YOU, TAZERMON!"

"The fu-GAHHHH"

!#$%^&*

"So. Ulquiorra."

"Yes."

"How are you?"

"I am fine."

"That's good."

"Yes."

"Are you any good at small talk?"

"No."

"Huh. I can tell."

"Yes."

"Well, uh, what's your favorite color?"

"I don't like colors."

"...Favorite animal?"

"I don't like animals."

"Favorite food?"

"I don't eat anything except for souls."

"I know."

"Then why did you ask?"

"Maybe you had a specific type of soul you preferred."

"Not particularly."

"Oh. Any love interests?"

"No."

"...None?"

"None."

"At all?"

"Yes."

"Yes you have one, or yes you have none at all?"

"...Yes?"

"Yes you don't not have any, or yes you do have not any?"

"...I don't understand."

"You should."

"But I do not."

"BUT YOU SHOULD."

"...But I-"

"Don't tell me you don't know when you know I know you know that you know I know that you know."

"...What?"

"Good. We'll go to human world then."

"What?"

"Let's get on with it. Chop-chop."

"Why are we going...to the human world?"

"Because you just said you wanted to?"

"I said no such thing."

"Too bad. We're going. Let's go. Now. Please."

"But-"

"No buts. Don't make me go through this again."

"..."

"Besides, Zasen told us to leave."

"I believe he meant the room."

"How do you know? You're assuming aren't you?"

"Yes."

"What if he did want you to leave to the human world? You'd be disobeying him wouldn't you? Wouldn't you?"

"I suppose."

"And you don't want that do you?"

"No."

"Then let's go. It makes for a more interesting storyline anyways."

"Storyline?"

**!#$%^&***

I appreciate the patience you guys have. I can officially say high school is boring, but not boring enough to give me free time to write. I'll do my best to keep updates coming sooner than, oh gee, **ALMOST A YEAR**. I'm so sorry. :( You don't even have to review this, I don't deserve them.

And you can also assume that the next chapter will be taking place in the human world.


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